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4     <title>The Quote Farm</title>
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10    
11     <p align="center"><b><font size="4">The Quote Farm</font></b></p>
12     <hr>
13     <p>Each chapter of the book (a work in progress) begins with a quote.&nbsp; The
14     web page is a staging area for quotes that might potentially be used.&nbsp; The
15     Quote Farm was previously an appendix in the book, but it was removed and placed
16     here, since it will not appear in final revisions of the book.</p>
17     <hr>
18     <p><b><u>Bookmarks (To This Page)</u></b></p>
19     <ul>
20     <li><a href="#attractiveness_female">Attractiveness, Female</a></li>
21     <li><a href="#aviation_and_space" target="_self">Aviation And Space</a></li>
22     <li><a href="#beer" target="_self">Beer</a></li>
23     <li><a href="#capitalism" target="_self">Capitalism</a></li>
24     <li><a href="#celeb_beaut_pag_cont" target="_self">Celebrities, Beauty Pageant
25     Contestants</a></li>
26     <li><a href="#celebrities_brooke_shields" target="_self">Celebrities, Brooke
27     Shields</a></li>
28     <li><a href="#celebrities_mariah_carey" target="_self">Celebrities, Mariah
29     Carey</a></li>
30     <li><a href="#censorship" target="_self">Censorship</a></li>
31     <li><a href="#computers_and_computing" target="_self">Computers And Computing</a></li>
32     <li><a href="#courage" target="_self">Courage</a></li>
33     <li><a href="#freedom_and_civil_liberties" target="_self">Freedom And Civil
34     Liberties</a></li>
35     <li><a href="#general_humor" target="_self">General Humor</a></li>
36     <li><a href="#hard_work" target="_self">Hard Work</a></li>
37     <li><a href="#hum_nat_soc_int" target="_self">Human Nature And Social
38     Interactions</a></li>
39     <li><a href="#histfig_napoleon" target="_self">Historical Figures, Napoleon</a></li>
40     <li><a href="#marriage_fav_manview" target="_self">Marriage (Favorable, From The Man's Point Of
41     View)</a></li>
42     <li><a href="#marriage_unfav_genderless" target="_self">Marriage (Unfavorable,
43     Genderless)</a></li>
44     <li><a href="#marriage_unfav_manview" target="_self">Marriage (Unfavorable, From The Man's Point Of
45     View)</a></li>
46     <li><a href="#microsoft" target="_self">Microsoft</a></li>
47     <li><a href="#old_age" target="_self">Old Age</a></li>
48     <li><a href="#pets_cats" target="_self">Pets, Cats</a></li>
49     <li><a href="#philo_aristotle" target="_self">Philosophers, Aristotle</a></li>
50     <li><a href="#philo_henry_david_thoreau" target="_self">Philosophers, Henry David
51     Thoreau</a></li>
52     <li><a href="#police_and_law_enforcement" target="_self">Police And Law
53     Enforcement</a></li>
54     <li><a href="#politfig_winston_churchill" target="_self">Political Figures, Winston
55     Churchill</a></li>
56     <li><a href="#polit_fig_bill_hilary_clinton" target="_self">Political Figures, Bill And Hilary
57     Clinton</a></li>
58     <li><a href="#politfig_al_gore" target="_self">Political Figures, Al Gore</a></li>
59     <li><a href="#politfig_henry_kissinger" target="_self">Political Figures, Henry
60     Kissinger</a></li>
61     <li><a href="#politfig_colin_powell" target="_self">Political Figures, Colin
62     Powell</a></li>
63     <li><a href="#politfig_dan_quayle" target="_self">Political Figures, Dan
64     Quayle</a></li>
65     <li><a href="#politfig_ronald_reagan" target="_self">Political Figures, Ronald
66     Reagan</a></li>
67     <li><a href="#polit_polit_doubletalk" target="_self">Politics, Political Doubletalk,
68     Doubletalk</a></li>
69     <li><a href="#religion" target="_self">Religion</a></li>
70     <li><a href="#sci_mat_marie_curie" target="_self">Scientists And Mathematicians, Marie
71     Curie</a></li>
72     <li><a href="#sci_mat_edsger_dijkstra" target="_self">Scientists And Mathematicians, Edsger
73     Dijkstra</a></li>
74     <li><a href="#sci_mat_albert_einstein" target="_self">Scientists And Mathematicians, Albert
75     Einstein</a></li>
76     <li><a href="#sci_mat_gh_hardy" target="_self">Scientists And Mathematicians,
77     G.H. Hardy</a></li>
78     <li><a href="#sci_mat_james_s_harris" target="_self">Scientists And Mathematicians, James S.
79     Harris</a></li>
80     <li><a href="#sci_mat_bertrand_russell" target="_self">Scientists And Mathematicians, Bertrand
81     Russell</a></li>
82     <li><a href="#sci_mat_carl_sagan" target="_self">Scientists And Mathematicians, Carl
83     Sagan</a></li>
84     <li><a href="#software_software_engineering_etc" target="_self">Software, Software Engineering,
85     Etc.</a></li>
86     <li><a href="#sports_and_sports_figures" target="_self">Sports And Sports
87     Figures</a></li>
88     <li><a href="#unpl_wk_sit_bad_bosses_etc" target="_self">Unpleasant Work Situations, Bad Bosses,
89     Etc.</a></li>
90     <li><a href="#acknowledgements" target="_self">Acknowledgements</a></li>
91     </ul>
92     <hr>
93     <p><b><u><a name="attractiveness_female"></a>Attractiveness, Female</u></b></p>
94     <ul>
95     <li>&quot;She's got what I call bobsled looks: going downhill fast.&quot;--Craig Nova</li>
96     </ul>
97     <hr>
98     <p><b><u><a name="aviation_and_space"></a>Aviation And Space</u></b></p>
99     <ul>
100     <li>&quot;A 'good' landing is one from which you can walk away.&nbsp; A
101     'great'
102     landing is one after which they can use the plane again."--Rules of the Air,
103     #8&nbsp; (This quote appeared in the signature of an e-mail by <a href="mailto:benny@bennyvision.com"> Chris
104     Bensend</a>. Chris was careful to point
105     out in subsequent correspondence that he was not the originator of the quote,
106     and is not sure where it comes from.)</li>
107     <li>&quot;A complex system has complex failure modes.&quot;--John J. Nance, ABC
108     aviation correspondent, commenting on February 1, 2003 on the loss of the space
109     shuttle <i>Columbia</i>.</li>
110     </ul>
111     <hr>
112     <p><b><u><a name="beer"></a>Beer</u></b></p>
113     <ul>
114     <li>&quot;He was a wise man who invented beer.&quot;--Plato</li>
115     <li>&quot;Work is the curse of the drinking class.&quot;--Oscar Wilde</li>
116     <li>&quot;Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be
117     happy.&quot;--Benjamin Franklin</li>
118     <li>&quot;If you ever reach total enlightenment while drinking beer, I bet it
119     makes beer shoot out your nose.&quot;--Deep Thought, Jack Handy</li>
120     <li>&quot;Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is
121     beer.&nbsp; Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel
122     does not go nearly as well with pizza.&quot;--Dave Barry</li>
123     <li>&quot;People who drink light 'beer' don't like the taste of beer; they just
124     like to pee a lot.&quot;--Capital Brewery, Middleton, WI</li>
125     <li>&quot;Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the
126     world.&quot;--Kaiser Wilhelm</li>
127     <li>&quot;Not all chemicals are bad.&nbsp; Without chemicals such as hydrogen and
128     oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in
129     beer.&quot;--Dave Barry</li>
130     <li>&quot;I drink to make other people interesting.&quot;--George Jean Nathan</li>
131     <li>&quot;They who drink beer will think beer.&quot;--Washington Irving</li>
132     <li>&quot;All right, brain, I don't like you and you don't like me so let's
133     just do this and I'll get back to killing you with beer.&quot;--Homer Simpson</li>
134     <li>&quot;A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank
135     her.&quot;--W.C. Fields</li>
136     </ul>
137     <hr>
138     <p><b><u><a name="capitalism"></a>Capitalism</u></b></p>
139     <ul>
140     <li>&quot;Companies come and go.&nbsp; It's ... part of the genius of
141     capitalism.&quot;--U.S. Treasury Secretary Paul O'Neill, in January of 2002, in
142     response to the bankruptcy filing by Enron</li>
143     <li>&quot;I've watched lots of corporations come and go.&nbsp; ... There are
144     very few companies that have been around for 40 or 50 years.&nbsp; ... Companies
145     come and go.&nbsp; It's part of the genius of capitalism.&nbsp; People get to make good
146     decisions or bad decisions, and they get to pay the consequences or to enjoy the
147     fruits of their decisions.&nbsp; That's the way the system works.&quot;--U.S. Treasury
148     Secretary Paul O'Neill, in January of 2002, in response to the bankruptcy filing
149     by Enron</li>
150     <li>&quot;I didn't think this was worthy of me running across the street and
151     telling the president.&nbsp; I don't go across the street and tell the president every
152     time somebody calls me.&quot;--U.S. Treasury Secretary Paul O'Neill, in January of
153     2002, defending his decision not to advise President Bush of Enron's financial
154     difficulties</li>
155     <li>&quot;... unless there's an issue related to the company that reaches
156     to public responsibility ... in the American capitalist system, companies
157     are responsible for their actions ...&nbsp; The company had a duty to inform its
158     shareholders and its employees about things that were going on inside the
159     company.&nbsp; That's not a federal government responsibility."--U.S. Treasury
160     Secretary Paul O'Neill, in January of 2002, defending his decision not to take
161     any federal action to help Enron as its stock price collapsed and it was forced
162     into bankruptcy</li>
163     </ul>
164     <hr>
165     <p><b><u><a name="celeb_beaut_pag_cont"></a>Celebrities, Beauty Pageant
166     Contestants</u></b></p>
167     <ul>
168     <li><b>Question:</b>&nbsp; &quot;If you could live forever, would you and why?&quot;&nbsp;
169     <b>Answer:</b>&nbsp; &quot;I
170     would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were
171     supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live
172     forever, which is why I would not live forever&quot;--Miss Alabama in the 1994 Miss
173     USA contest</li>
174     </ul>
175     <hr>
176     <p><b><u><a name="celebrities_brooke_shields"></a>Celebrities, Brooke Shields</u></b></p>
177     <ul>
178     <li>&quot;Smoking kills.&nbsp; If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of
179     your life.&quot;--Brooke Shields, during an interview to become spokesperson for a
180     federal anti-smoking campaign.</li>
181     </ul>
182     <hr>
183     <p><b><u><a name="celebrities_mariah_carey"></a>Celebrities, Mariah Carey</u></b></p>
184     <ul>
185     <li>&quot;Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the
186     world, I can't help but cry.&nbsp; I mean I'd love to be skinny like that but not with
187     all those flies and death and stuff.&quot;--Mariah Carey</li>
188     </ul>
189     <hr>
190     <p><b><u><a name="censorship"></a>Censorship</u></b></p>
191     <ul>
192     <li>&quot;Without censorship, things can get terribly confused in the public
193     mind.&quot;--General William Westmoreland</li>
194     </ul>
195     <hr>
196     <p><b><u><a name="computers_and_computing"></a>Computers And Computing</u></b></p>
197     <ul>
198     <li>&quot;A computer lets you make mistakes faster than any other invention,
199     with the possible exception of handguns and Tequila.&quot;--Mitch Ratcliffe, as
200     quoted by <a href="mailto:bryanp@visi.com"> Bryan Packer</a></li>
201     <li>&quot;Programming, an artform that fights back.&quot;--<a href="mailto:adiaz@msi.net.ph">Anuerin G. Diaz</a></li>
202     <li>&quot;A distributed system is one in which the failure of a computer you
203     didn't even know existed can render your own computer unusable.&quot;--Les
204     Lamport, s
205     quoted in newsgroup post by <a href="mailto:rick@ox.compsoc.net"> Richard Heylen</a></li>
206     <li>&quot;Every program has at least one bug and can be reduced by at least one
207     line.&nbsp; By induction, then, every program can be reduced to a single instruction,
208     and that will be wrong.&quot;--From a newsgroup post by <a href="mailto:iddw@hotmail.com"> Dave Hansen</a>
209     in April 2003</li>
210    
211     <li>
212    
213     &quot;
214    
215     I invented the term 'Object Oriented' and I can tell you that I did not have C++ in mind.&quot;-- Alan Kay
216     </li>
217    
218     <li>
219    
220     &quot;
221    
222     Claiming Java is easier than C++ is like saying K2 is shorter than Everest.&quot;-- Larry O'Brien, editor
223     <i> Software Development</i>
224     </li>
225    
226     <li>
227    
228     &quot;
229    
230     A lot of people 'think' they understand C, but it is not only stranger than they imagine, it is stranger than they
231     'can' imagine.&quot;-- Richard A. O'Keefe
232     </li>
233    
234     <li>
235    
236     &quot;
237    
238     C is its own virus.&quot;-- Miguel Gallo
239     </li>
240    
241     <li>
242    
243     &quot;
244    
245     C gives you all the power of assembler ... along with the portability of assembler!&quot;--Unknown
246     </li>
247    
248     <li>
249    
250     &quot;
251    
252     Java is a very popular language-- surprisingly popular considering it doesn't seem to have learnt the lessons of Simula 67.&quot;-- Malcolm Atkinson
253     </li>
254    
255     <li>
256    
257     &quot;
258    
259     The nice thing about standards is that there are so many of them to choose from.&quot;-- Andrew S. Tanenbaum
260     </li>
261    
262     <li>
263    
264     &quot;The debate over computer-assisted proofs is the high-end version of
265     arguments over using calculators in math classes—whether technology spurs
266     greater achievements by speeding rote calculations or deprives people of
267     fundamentals.&quot;--From an April 6, 2004 article in the New York Times (Web
268     Edition) entitled, &quot;<i>In Math, Computers Don't Lie.&nbsp; Or Do They</i>&quot;,
269     by Kenneth Chang
270     </li>
271    
272     </ul>
273     <hr>
274     <p><b><u><a name="courage"></a>Courage</u></b></p>
275     <ul>
276     <li>&quot;Courage is rightly esteemed the first of human qualities ...
277     because it is the quality which guarantees all others.&quot;--Winston Churchill</li>
278     <li>&quot;The desire for safety stands against every great and noble
279     enterprise.&quot;--Tacitus, Roman historian</li>
280     <li>"One man with courage makes a majority."--Andrew Jackson</li>
281     <li>"What separates the winners from the losers is how a person reacts to
282     each new twist of fate."--Donald Trump</li>
283     <li>"No captain can do very wrong if he places his ship alongside that of
284     the enemy."--Admiral Horatio Nelson</li>
285     <li>&quot;[Admiral Nelson's counsel] guided me time and again.&nbsp; On the eve of
286     the critical battle of Santa Cruz, in which the Japanese ships outnumbered ours
287     more than two to one, I sent my task force commanders this dispatch: <i>ATTACK
288     REPEAT ATTACK</i>.&nbsp; They did attack, heroically, and when the battle was done, the
289     enemy turned away.&nbsp; All problems, personal, national, or combat, become smaller
290     if you don't dodge them, but confront them.&nbsp; Touch a thistle timidly, and it
291     pricks you; grasp it boldly, and its spines crumble.&nbsp; Carry the battle to the
292     enemy!&nbsp; Lay your ship alongside his!&quot;--Admiral William 'Bull' Halsey</li>
293     <li>&quot;Never forget that no military leader has ever become great without
294     audacity.&quot;--Karl von Clausewitz</li>
295     </ul>
296     <hr>
297     <p><b><u><a name="freedom_and_civil_liberties"></a>Freedom And Civil Liberties</u></b></p>
298     <ul>
299     <li>&quot;First they came for the political activists, and I didn't defend
300     them, because I wasn't an activist.&nbsp; Then they came for the gun owners, and I
301     didn't defend them, because I wasn't a gun owner.&nbsp; Then they came for the writers
302     and philosophers, and I didn't defend them, because I wasn't a writer or
303     philosopher.&nbsp; Then they came for me, and there was nobody left to defend
304     me.&quot;--Unknown</li>
305     <li>&quot;Those who would trade personal liberties in the name of security
306     shall have neither.&quot;--Ben Franklin</li>
307     <li>&quot;We've been singing the same song in this country for more than 200
308     years.&nbsp; It's a very good song, and I want to keep singing it.&nbsp; I'm very leery of
309     changing the lyrics.&quot;--Art Babbott, Flagstaff, Arizona City Council member,
310     who sponsored the December, 2002 resolution in Flagstaff urging federal
311     authorities to respect citizens' civil rights when fighting terrorism</li>
312     </ul>
313     <hr>
314     <p><b><u><a name="general_humor"></a>General Humor</u></b></p>
315     <ul>
316     <li>&quot;I hope I don't sound like an old-fashioned stick-in-the-mud, but when
317     I hear about people making vast fortunes without doing any productive work or
318     contributing anything to society, my reaction is: 'How can I get in on
319     that?'&quot;--Dave Barry</li>
320     <li>&quot;I may seem more arrogant, but I think that's just because you didn't
321     realize how arrogant I was before.&quot;--Jeffrey Hobbs, Tcl Ambassador, Ajuba
322     Solutions</li>
323     <li>&quot;Researchers have discovered that chocolate produces some of the same
324     reactions in the brain as marijuana.&nbsp; The researchers also discovered other
325     similarities between the two, but can't remember what they are.&quot;--Matt Lauer
326     on NBC's <i>Today</i> show</li>
327     <li>&quot;Some of us are becoming the men we wanted to marry.&quot;--Gloria
328     Steinem.</li>
329     <li>&quot;I don't feel we did wrong in taking this great country away from
330     them.&nbsp; There were great numbers of people who needed new land, and the Indians
331     were selfishly trying to keep it for themselves.&quot;--John Wayne</li>
332     <li>&quot;Your food stamps will be stopped effective March 1992 because we
333     received notice that you passed away.&nbsp; May God bless you.&nbsp; You may reapply if
334     there is a change in your circumstances.&quot;--Department of Social Services,
335     Greenville, South Carolina</li>
336     <li>&quot;We apologize for the error in last week's paper in which we stated
337     that Mr. Arnold Dogbody was a defective in the police force.&nbsp; We meant, of
338     course, that Mr. Dogbody is a detective in the police farce.&quot;--Correction
339     Notice in the Ely Standard, a British newspaper</li>
340     <li>&quot;If somebody has a bad heart, they can plug this jack in at night as
341     they go to bed and it will monitor their heart throughout the night.&nbsp; And the
342     next morning, when they wake up dead, there'll be a record.&quot;--Mark S. Fowler,
343     FCC Chairman</li>
344     <li>&quot;Although small, silky sharks are bad news.&nbsp; They're nervous, they're
345     aggressive, and there's lots of them.&quot;--<i>Sharks In The Golden Triangle</i>,
346     CBC.</li>
347     <li>&quot;People are more violently opposed to fur than leather because it's
348     safer to harrass rich women than motorcycle gangs.&quot;--from a rubber stamp
349     purchased at <i>Chestnut Creek, Inc.</i> in Dearborn, Michigan, USA.</li>
350     <li>&quot;Theory may inform, but Practice convinces.&quot;--George Bain.</li>
351     <li>&quot;I used to be disgusted, now I find I'm just amused.&quot;--Elvis
352     Costello.</li>
353     <li>&quot;Heroic people have heroic flaws.&quot;--Unknown</li>
354     <li>&quot;The reason I rob banks is 'cause that's where the money
355     is.&quot;--Willie Sutton</li>
356     <li>&quot;A lot of you are making security products that are an attractive
357     nuisance.&nbsp; Shame on you.&nbsp; I want you to grow up.&nbsp; I want functions and assurances
358     in security devices.&nbsp; We do not beta test on customers.&nbsp; If my product fails,
359     someone might die.&quot;--Brian Snow, of the National Security Agency's Information
360     Systems Security Organization, speaking at the Black Hat Briefings security
361     conference</li>
362     <li>&quot;There are three kinds of people: the ones that learn by reading, the
363     few who learn by observation, and the rest of them who have to touch the fire to
364     see for themselves if it's really hot.&quot;--Unknown</li>
365     <li>&quot;A mathematician is a device for turning coffee into
366     theorems.&quot;--Paul Erdos</li>
367     <li>&quot;A person needs only two tools: WD-40 and duct tape.&nbsp; If it doesn't
368     move and it should, use the WD-40.&nbsp; If it moves and it shouldn't, use the
369     tape.&quot;--Unknown</li>
370     <li>&quot;Fame is vapor, popularity is an accident, riches take wings.&nbsp; Only one
371     thing endures and that is character.&quot;--Horace Greeley</li>
372     <li>&quot;My mother is such an alarmist, always worried!&nbsp; One little cough, and
373     she thinks I have pneumonia.&nbsp; One little headache, and she is sure that I have a
374     brain tumor.&nbsp; One little lie, and she thinks I am destined to be president
375     ... .&quot;--Unknown</li>
376     <li>&quot;Stupidity is a renewable resource.&quot;--Unknown</li>
377     <li>&quot;Anything is possible if you don't know what you're talking
378     about.&quot;--Unknown</li>
379     <li>&quot;A government that robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend upon the
380     support of Paul.&quot;--G. B. Shaw</li>
381     <li>&quot;All human beings should try to learn before they die what they are
382     running from, and to, and why.&quot;--James Thurber</li>
383     <li>&quot;It is with rivers as it is with people: the greatest are not the most
384     agreeable nor the best to live with.&quot;--Henry van Dyke</li>
385     <li>&quot;Everyone has talent. What is rare is the courage to follow that
386     talent to the dark place where it leads.&quot;--Erica Jong</li>
387     <li>&quot;A government that is big enough to give you all you want is big
388     enough to take it all away.&quot;--Barry Goldwater</li>
389     <li>&quot;If a hole is in the wrong place, then no amount of digging is going
390     to put it in the right place.&quot;--Edward de Bono</li>
391     <li>&quot;Misers aren't fun to live with, but they make wonderful
392     ancestors.&quot;--David Brenner</li>
393     <li>&quot;One way to prevent progress is by arguing that any first step is
394     unfair to somebody.&quot;--Unknown</li>
395     <li>&quot;People think it must be fun to be a super genius, but they don't
396     realize how hard it is to put up with all the idiots in the world.&quot;--Calvin
397     (&amp; Hobbes)</li>
398     <li>&quot;Montreal winters are an intelligence test, and we who are here have
399     failed it.&quot;--Doug Camilli</li>
400     <li>&quot;Growing up, my mom always claimed to feel bad when a bird would slam
401     head-first into our living room window.&nbsp; If she <i>really</i> felt bad, though,
402     she'd have moved the bird feeder outside.&quot;--Rich Johnson</li>
403     <li>&quot;I realize that there are certain hardships that only females must
404     endure, such as childbirth, waiting in lines for public-restroom stalls, and a
405     crippling, psychotic obsession with shoe color.&nbsp; Also, females tend to reach
406     emotional maturity very quickly, so that by age 7 they are no longer capable of
407     seeing the humor in loud inadvertent public blasts of flatulence, whereas males
408     can continue to derive vast enjoyment from this well into their 80s.&quot;--Dave
409     Barry</li>
410     <li>"Disease generally begins that equality which death completes; the
411     distinctions which set one man so much above another are very little perceived
412     in the gloom of a sick chamber, where it will be vain to expect entertainment
413     from the gay, or instruction from the wise; where all human glory is
414     obliterated, the wit is clouded, the reasoner perplexed, and the hero subdued;
415     where the highest and brightest of mortal beings finds nothing left him but the
416     consciousness of innocence."--Samuel Johnson</li>
417     <li>"More and more, our relationship with the industrial food industry
418     begins to resemble the one it has with its chickens, pigs and cows.&nbsp; In exchange
419     for zero responsibility, we get zero control."--Kalle Lasn, <i>Culture Jam</i></li>
420     <li>"Es ist ein Bluff.&nbsp; Sie können Autos und Kühlschränke
421     bauen, aber keine Flugzeuge!"--Hermann Göring im Jahre 1941 über
422     die industriellen Fähigkeiten der U.S.A</li>
423     <li>"There's no such thing as a <i>pretty good</i> alligator wrestler."--Original source unknown:&nbsp;
424     reprinted in February 2001 Scientific
425     American, Steve Mirsky's column</li>
426     <li>"I'd rather work with someone who's good at their job but doesn't like
427     me, than someone who likes me but is a ninny."--Sam Donaldson, as reproduced
428     in the July 2001 <i>Reader's Digest</i></li>
429     <li>"Pain is candy for the focused mind."--Agent Bobby Hobbes (actor
430     Paul Ben-Victor) in <i>The Invisible Man</i>, air date July 27, 2001 on the
431     Sci-Fi Channel</li>
432     <li>
433     "The greatest tragedy in mankind's entire history may be the hijacking
434     of morality by religion.&nbsp; However valuable--even necessary--that may have been
435     in enforcing good behavior on primitive peoples, their association is now
436     counterproductive.&nbsp; Yet at the very moment when they should be decoupled,
437     sanctimonious nitwits are calling for a return to morals based on superstition."--Arthur C. Clarke</li>
438     <li>
439     "The closest I ever got to a 4.0 in college was my blood alcohol content."--Unknown
440     </li>
441     <li>
442     "I live in my own little world.&nbsp; But it's ok...they know me here. "--Unknown
443     </li>
444     <li>
445     "I saw a woman wearing a sweatshirt with 'Guess' on it. I said, 'Implants?"'--Unknown
446     </li>
447     <li>
448     "I don't do drugs anymore 'cause I find I get the same effect just
449     standing up really fast."--Unknown
450     </li>
451     <li>
452     "Sign In Pet Store:&nbsp; 'Buy one dog, get one flea ..."--Unknown
453     </li>
454     <li>
455     "Money can't buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to live with."--Unknown
456     </li>
457     <li>
458     "I got a sweater for Christmas ... I wanted a screamer or a moaner."--Unknown
459     </li>
460     <li>
461     "I don't approve of political jokes ... I've seen too many of
462     them get elected."--Unknown
463     </li>
464     <li>
465     "There are two sides to every divorce:&nbsp; yours and shithead's."--Unknown
466     </li>
467     <li>
468     "If life deals you lemons, make lemonade;&nbsp; if it deals you tomatoes,
469     make Bloody Marys.&nbsp; But if it deals you a truckload of hand grenades ... now
470     THAT'S a message!!"--Unknown
471     </li>
472     <li>
473     "I love being married.&nbsp; It's so great to find that one special person
474     you want to annoy for the rest of your life."--Unknown
475     </li>
476     <li>
477     "Shopping tip:&nbsp; You can get shoes for 85 cents at the bowling alley."--Unknown
478     </li>
479     <li>
480     "I am a nobody, and nobody is perfect; therefore I am perfect."--Unknown
481     </li>
482     <li>
483     "I married my wife for her looks ... but not the ones she's been
484     giving me lately!"--Unknown
485     </li>
486     <li>
487     "Everyday I beat my own previous record for number of consecutive days
488     I've stayed alive."--Unknown
489     </li>
490     <li>
491     "Two peanuts were walking down the street.&nbsp; One was a salted."--Unknown
492     </li>
493     <li>
494     "Isn't it funny how the mood can be ruined so quickly by just one
495     busted condom?"--Unknown
496     </li>
497     <li>
498     "If carrots are so good for the eyes, how come I see so many dead
499     rabbits on the highway?"--Unknown
500     </li>
501     <li>
502     "Welcome To Shit Creek--Sorry, We're Out of Paddles!"--Unknown
503     </li>
504     <li>
505     "How come we choose from just two people to run for president and 50
506     for Miss America?"--Unknown
507     </li>
508     <li>
509     "Isn't having a smoking section in a restaurant like having a peeing
510     section in a swimming pool?"--Unknown
511     </li>
512     <li>
513     "Marriage changes passion ... suddenly you're in bed with a relative."--Unknown
514     </li>
515     <li>
516     "Why is it that most nudists are people you don't want to see naked?"--Unknown
517     </li>
518     <li>
519     "The next time you feel like complaining remember:&nbsp; Your garbage
520     disposal probably eats better than thirty percent of the people in this world."--Unknown
521     </li>
522     <li>
523     "Snowmen fall from Heaven unassembled."--Unknown
524     </li>
525     <li>
526     "Every time I walk into a singles bar I can hear Mom's wise words:&nbsp; 'Don't pick that up, you don't know where it's
527     been.'&quot;--Unknown
528     </li>
529     <li>
530     "I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone,
531     but they've always worked for me."--Hunter S. Thompson
532     </li>
533     <li>
534     "I speak Spanish to God, Italian to women, French to men, and German
535     to my dog."--Emporer Charles V
536     </li>
537     <li>
538     "It is unfortunate that the HP board has seemingly missed what the
539     company's stockholders have clearly recognized:&nbsp; that dissent is not disloyalty,
540     that healthy boards need not agree on every issue and that while the management
541     and board may run the company, the stockholders are the true owners of the
542     company."--Walter Hewlett, in a statement after not being reappointed to the
543     Hewlett-Packard board of directors in March of 2002 due to an adversarial
544     relationship with the company
545     </li>
546     <li>
547     "Be true to your teeth or they will be false to you."--Unknown
548     </li>
549     <li>
550     "An exclamation point is like laughing at your own joke."--F. Scott
551     Fitzgerald
552     </li>
553     <li>
554     "It is not enough to succeed.&nbsp; Others must fail."--Gore Vidal
555     </li>
556     <li>
557     "Nostalgia isn't what it used to be."--Unknown
558     </li>
559     <li>
560     "They call television a medium because nothing's well done."--Goodman Ace.
561     </li>
562     <li>
563     "Diplomacy is the art of saying 'nice doggie' 'till you can find a rock."--Wynn Catlin
564     </li>
565     <li>
566     "I'm worried that just as clothes dryers have the knack of making
567     socks disappear, the federal government has discovered a core competency of
568     losing computers."--Charles E. Grassley (R-Iowa) in an August 2002 letter to
569     Mitchell E. Daniels Jr., director of the Office of Management and Budget, in
570     response to a report that thousands of personal computers were lost within the
571     IRS
572     </li>
573     <li>
574     "You can't outrun Death forever.&nbsp; But you can make the Bastard work for it."--Major Korgo
575     Korgar, "Last of The Lancers", AFC 32&nbsp; (This quote
576     appeared as a slide starting the episode <i>Lava and Rockets, Episode \#213</i>
577     of the TV series <i>Andromeda</i> in 2002.&nbsp; It is not clear to me if this is a
578     real quote by a fictitious person (is Korgo Korgar real?) or whether it is based
579     on a real-life quote by another person, or whether it was created by the show's
580     writers.&nbsp; This needs to be researched.)
581     </li>
582     <li>
583     "Will someone please explain to me the logic that says we can trust
584     someone with a Boeing 747 in bad weather, but not with a Glock 9 millimeter?"--Senator Zell Miller, in 9/2002 in support of a measure allowing
585     the arming of airline pilots
586     </li>
587     <li>
588     "The Marines I have seen around the world have the cleanest bodies,
589     the filthiest minds, the highest morale, and the lowest morals of any group of
590     animals I have ever seen.&nbsp; Thank God for the United States Marine Corps!"--Eleanor Roosevelt, First Lady of the United States, 1945
591     </li>
592     <li>
593     "You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white
594     guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the Swiss hold the Americas Cup, France is
595     accusing the U.S. of arrogance, and Germany doesn't want to go to war."--Unknown Author (Received via e-mail during operation
596     <i>Iraqi Freedom</i> on March 25, 2003.)
597     </li>
598     <li>
599     "Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine."--Author
600     unknown, in the footer of a newsgroup post by <a href="mailto:iddw@hotmail.com"> Dave Hansen</a>
601     in April 2003.
602     </li>
603     <li>
604     &quot;Every great scientific truth goes through three states:&nbsp; first,
605     people say it conflicts with the Bible; next, they say it has been discovered
606     before; lastly, they say they always believed it.&quot;---Louis Agassiz
607     (1807-1873), Swiss-born American naturalist.
608     </li>
609     <li>
610     &quot;Laugh and the world laughs with you.&nbsp; Cry and you cry with your girlfriends.&quot;--Laurie
611     Kuslansky
612     </li>
613     <li>
614     &quot;My second favorite household chore is ironing. My first being, hitting my
615     head on the top bunk bed until I faint.&quot;--Erma Bombeck
616     </li>
617     <li>
618     &quot;A man's got to do what a man's got to do. A woman must do what he can't.&quot;--Rhonda
619     Hansome
620     </li>
621     <li>
622     &quot;The phrase 'working mother' is redundant.&quot;--Jane Sellman
623     </li>
624     <li>
625     &quot;Every time I close the door on reality it comes in through the windows.&quot;--Jennifer
626     Unlimited
627     </li>
628     <li>
629     &quot;Whatever women must do they must do twice as well as men to be thought half
630     as good. Luckily, this is not difficult.&quot;--Charlotte Whitton
631     </li>
632     <li>
633     &quot;I try to take one day at a time, but sometimes several days attack me at
634     once.&quot;--Jennifer Unlimited
635     </li>
636     <li>
637     &quot;If you can't be a good example, then you'll just have to be a horrible
638     warning.&quot;--Catherine
639     </li>
640     <li>
641     &quot;When I was young, I was put in a school for retarded kids for two years
642     before they realized I actually had a hearing loss.&nbsp; And they called ME slow!&quot;--Kathy
643     Buckley
644     </li>
645     <li>
646     &quot;I'm not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know I'm not dumb ...
647     and I'm also not blonde.&quot;--Dolly Parton
648     </li>
649     <li>
650     &quot;If high heels were so wonderful, men would still be wearing them.&quot;--Sue
651     Grafton
652     </li>
653     <li>
654     &quot;I'm not going to vacuum 'til Sears makes one you can ride on.&quot;--Roseanne
655     Barr
656     </li>
657     <li>
658     &quot;When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping.&nbsp; Men invade another
659     country.&quot;--Elayne Boosler
660     </li>
661     <li>
662     &quot;Behind every successful man is a surprised woman.&quot;--Maryon Pearson
663     </li>
664     <li>
665     &quot;In politics, if you want anything said, ask a man- if you want anything done,
666     ask a woman.&quot;--Margaret Thatcher
667     </li>
668     <li>
669     &quot;I have yet to hear a man ask for advice on how to combine marriage and a
670     career.&quot;--Gloria Steinem
671     </li>
672     <li>
673     &quot;I am a marvelous housekeeper.&nbsp; Every time I leave a man I keep his house.&quot;--Zsa
674     Zsa Gabor
675     </li>
676     <li>
677     &quot;Nobody can make you feel inferior without your permission.&quot;--Eleanor
678     Roosevelt
679     </li>
680     <li>&quot;In this world there are only two tragedies; one is not getting what one wants,
681     the other is getting it.&quot;-- Oscar Wilde
682     </li>
683    
684     <li>&quot;It's so much easier to suggest solutions when you don't know too much about the problem.&quot;--Malcolm Forbes (1919 - 1990)
685     </li>
686    
687     <li>&quot;I have always wished that my computer would be as easy to use as my telephone.&nbsp;
688     My wish has come true.&nbsp; I no longer know how to use my telephone.&quot;--Bjarne Stroustrup, computer science professor, designer of C++ programming language (1950- )
689     </li>
690    
691     <li>&quot;In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.&quot;--Ambrose Bierce (1842 - 1914), The Devil's Dictionary
692     </li>
693    
694     <li>&quot;Never underestimate the bandwidth of a station wagon filled with backup tapes.&quot;--Jim Gray, ACM Turing Award winner
695     </li>
696    
697     <li>&quot;A patriot must always be ready to defend his country against its government.&quot;--Edward Abbey, naturalist and author (1927-1989)
698     </li>
699    
700     <li>&quot;When governments fear the people there is liberty.&nbsp; When the people fear the government there is tyranny.&quot;--Thomas Jefferson, third US president, architect and author (1743-1826)
701     </li>
702    
703     <li>&quot;The hardest person to awaken is the one already awake.&quot;--Tagalog saying
704     </li>
705    
706     <li>&quot;Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity.&quot;--Hanlon's Razor
707     </li>
708    
709     <li>&quot;It is better to know some of the questions than all of the answers.&quot;--James Thurber (1894 - 1961)
710     </li>
711    
712     <li>
713    
714     &quot;Part of the inhumanity of the computer is that, once it is competently programmed and working smoothly, it is completely honest.&quot;--Isaac
715     Asimov, author (1920 - 1992)
716     </li>
717    
718     <li>
719    
720    
721     &quot;Bureaucracy defends the status quo long past the time when the quo has lost its status.&quot;--Laurence J. Peter (1919 - 1988)
722     </li>
723    
724     <li>
725    
726     &quot;Any sufficiently advanced bureaucracy is indistinguishable from molasses.&quot;--Unknown
727     </li>
728    
729     <li>
730    
731     &quot;Patriotism is the willingness to kill and be killed for trivial reasons.&quot;--Bertrand Russell (1872 - 1970)
732     </li>
733    
734     <li>
735    
736     &quot;'My country, right or wrong,' is a thing that no patriot would think of saying except in a desperate case.&nbsp;
737     It is like saying, 'My mother, drunk or sober.'&quot; - G. K. Chesterton (1874 - 1936)
738     </li>
739    
740     <li>
741    
742     &quot;When I do good, I feel good; when I do bad, I feel bad, and that is my religion.&quot;--Abraham Lincoln, US President (1809 - 1865) (attributed)
743     </li>
744    
745     <li>&quot;To announce that there must be no criticism of the President, or that we are to stand by the President, right or wrong, is not only unpatriotic and servile, but is morally treasonable to the American public.&quot;--Theodore Roosevelt, 26th US President (1858-1919)
746     </li>
747    
748     <li>
749    
750     &quot;Computers are useless.&nbsp; They can only give you answers.&quot;--Pablo Picasso, artist (1881 - 1973)
751     </li>
752    
753     <li>
754    
755     &quot;Every decent man is ashamed of the government he lives under.&quot;--H. L. Mencken, author (1880 - 1956)
756     </li>
757    
758     <li>
759    
760     &quot;Sometimes even to live is an act of courage.&quot;--Lucius Annaeus Seneca, writer and philosopher (BCE 3-65 CE)
761     </li>
762    
763     <li>
764    
765     &quot;Finance is the art of passing money from hand to hand until it finally disappears.&quot;--Robert W. Sarnoff, RCA executive (1918-1997)
766     </li>
767    
768     <li>
769    
770     &quot;Genius may have its limitations, but stupidity is not thus handicapped.&quot;--Elbert Hubbard (1856 - 1915)
771     </li>
772    
773     <li>
774    
775     &quot;There are 10<sup>11</sup> stars in the galaxy.&nbsp; That used to be a huge number.&nbsp;
776     But it's only a hundred billion.&nbsp; It's less than the national deficit!&nbsp;
777     We used to call them astronomical numbers.&nbsp; Now we should call them economical numbers.&quot;--Richard Feynman, physicist, Nobel laureate (1918-1988)
778     </li>
779    
780     <li>&quot;The best liar is he who makes the smallest amount of lying go the longest way.&quot;--Samuel Butler (1835 - 1902)
781     </li>
782    
783     <li>
784    
785     &quot;Never express yourself more clearly than you think.&quot;--Niels Bohr
786     </li>
787    
788     <li>
789    
790     &quot;A gentleman is a man who can play the accordion but doesn't.&quot;--Unknown
791     </li>
792    
793     <li>
794    
795     &quot;Sometimes I think we're alone in the universe, and sometimes I think we're not.&nbsp;
796     In either case, the idea is quite staggering.&quot;--Arthur C Clarke, science fiction writer (1917- )
797     </li>
798    
799     <li>
800    
801     &quot;Now and then an innocent man is sent to the legislature.&quot;--Kin Hubbard (1868 - 1930)
802     </li>
803    
804     <li>
805    
806     &quot;Whenever you have an efficient government you have a dictatorship.&quot;--Harry S Truman (1884 - 1972)
807     </li>
808    
809     <li>
810    
811     &quot;Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when people laugh.&quot;--George Bernard Shaw, writer, Nobel laureate (1856-1950)
812     </li>
813    
814     <li>
815    
816     &quot;All of the books in the world contain no more information than is broadcast as video in a single large American city in a single year.&nbsp;
817     Not all bits have equal value.&quot;--Carl Sagan, astronomer, author (1934-1996)
818     </li>
819    
820     <li>
821    
822     &quot;The universe is not hostile, nor yet is it friendly.&nbsp; It is simply indifferent.&quot;--John Haynes&nbsp;
823     </li>
824    
825     <li>
826    
827     &quot;A committee is a cul-de-sac down which ideas are lured and then quietly strangled.&quot;--Sir Barnett Cocks
828     </li>
829    
830     <li>
831    
832     &quot;Nature is trying very hard to make us succeed, but nature does not depend on us.&nbsp;
833     We are not the only experiment.&quot;--R. Buckminster Fuller, engineer, designer, and architect (1895-1983)
834     </li>
835    
836     <li>
837    
838     &quot;Speech is conveniently located midway between thought and action, where it often substitutes for both.&quot;--John Andrew Holmes, 20th-century American author, physician
839     </li>
840    
841     <li>
842    
843     &quot;Worry is interest paid on trouble before it comes due.&quot;--William R. Inge, clergyman, scholar, and author (1860-1954)
844     </li>
845    
846     <li>
847    
848     &quot;Assassination:&nbsp; The extreme form of censorship.&quot;--George Bernard Shaw, writer, Nobel laureate (1856-1950)
849     </li>
850    
851     <li>
852    
853     &quot;History teaches us that men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all other alternatives.&quot;--Abba Eban, Israeli diplomat (1915-)
854     </li>
855    
856     <li>&quot;Success is getting what you want; happiness is wanting what you get.&quot;--Anonymous
857     </li>
858    
859     <li>
860    
861     &quot;The measure of a man's real character is what he would do if he knew he would never be found out.&quot;--Thomas Babington Macaulay, author and statesman (1800-1859)
862     </li>
863    
864     <li>
865    
866     &quot;Life is one long process of getting tired.&quot;--Samuel Butler, British author
867     (1835-1902)
868     </li>
869    
870     <li>
871    
872     &quot;Real knowledge is to know the extent of one's ignorance.&quot;--Confucius, philosopher and teacher (c. 551-478 BCE)
873     </li>
874    
875     <li>
876    
877     &quot;Never advise anyone to go to war or to marry.&quot;--Spanish Proverb
878     </li>
879    
880     <li>
881    
882     &quot;Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away.&quot;--Philip K. Dick, author (1928-1982)
883     </li>
884    
885     <li>
886    
887     &quot;Necessity is the plea for every infringement of human freedom.&nbsp; It is the argument of tyrants; it is the creed of slaves.&quot;--William Pitt, British prime-minister (1759-1806)
888     </li>
889    
890     <li>
891    
892     &quot;The believer is happy; the doubter is wise.&quot;--Hungarian proverb&nbsp;
893     </li>
894    
895     <li>
896    
897     &quot;Skeptics laugh in order not to weep.&quot;--Anatole France, French author, critic and poet (1844-1924)
898     </li>
899    
900     <li>
901    
902     &quot;I take a simple view of living.&nbsp; It is keep your eyes open and get on with it.&quot;--Laurence Olivier, British actor
903     (1907-1989)
904     </li>
905    
906     <li>
907    
908     &quot;In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life:&nbsp; it goes on.&quot;--Robert Frost, poet (1874-1963)
909     </li>
910    
911     <li>
912    
913     &quot;There are some that only employ words for the purpose of disguising their thoughts.&quot;--Voltaire, philosopher (1694-1778)
914     </li>
915    
916     <li>
917    
918     &quot;I have learnt silence from the talkative, toleration from the intolerant, and kindness from the unkind; yet strange, I am ungrateful to these teachers.&quot;--
919     Kahlil Gibran, mystic, poet and artist (1883-1931)
920     </li>
921    
922     <li>
923    
924     &quot;Human beings are the only creatures who are able to behave irrationally in the name of reason.&quot;--Ashley
925     Montagu, English anthropologist (1905-1999)
926     </li>
927    
928     <li>
929    
930     &quot;Those are my principles.&nbsp; If you don't like them I have others.&quot;--Groucho Marx, comedian (1890-1977)
931     </li>
932    
933     <li>
934    
935     &quot;Always remember that you are unique.&nbsp; Just like everyone else.&quot;--Unattributed
936     </li>
937    
938     <li>
939    
940     &quot;Perfection is attained by slow degrees; it requires the hand of time.&quot;--Voltaire, philosopher (1694-1778)
941     </li>
942    
943     <li>
944    
945     &quot;There's this thing called being so open-minded your brains drop out.&quot;--Richard Dawkins, biologist, author, philosopher (1941-)
946     </li>
947    
948     <li>
949    
950     &quot;All the world's a stage and most of us are desperately unrehearsed.&quot;--Sean
951     O'Casey, playwright (1880-1964)
952     </li>
953    
954     <li>
955    
956     &quot;Every man is a damned fool for at least five minutes every day.&nbsp; Wisdom consists in not exceeding the
957     limit.&quot;--Elbert Hubbard, author, editor, printer (1856-1915)
958     </li>
959    
960     <li>
961    
962     &quot;War is God's way of teaching Americans geography.&quot;--Ambrose Bierce, writer (1842-1914)
963     </li>
964    
965     <li>
966    
967     &quot;Never confuse motion with action.&quot;--Benjamin Franklin, statesman, author, and inventor (1706-1790)
968     </li>
969    
970     <li>
971    
972     &quot;Dignity consists not in possessing honors, but in the consciousness that we deserve them.&quot;--Aristotle, philosopher (384-322 BCE)
973     </li>
974    
975     <li>
976    
977     &quot;To a man with a hammer, everything looks like a nail.&quot;--Mark Twain, author and humorist (1835-1910)
978     </li>
979    
980     <li>
981    
982     &quot;Make haste slowly.&quot;--Caesar Augustus, Roman emperor (63 BCE-14 CE)
983     </li>
984    
985     <li>
986    
987     &quot;It is a bit embarrassing to have been concerned with the human problem all one's life and find at the end that one has no more to offer by way of advice than
988     'try to be a little kinder.'&quot;--Aldous Huxley, novelist (1894-1963)
989     </li>
990    
991     <li>
992    
993     &quot;Our sun is one of 100 billion stars in our galaxy.&nbsp; Our galaxy is one of the billions of galaxies populating the universe.&nbsp;
994     It would be the height of presumption to think that we are the only living things within that enormous immensity.&quot;--Wernher von Braun, rocket engineer (1912-1977)
995     </li>
996    
997     <li>
998    
999     &quot;Experience teaches us to be most on our guard to protect liberty when the government's purpose is beneficent.&nbsp;
1000     Men born to freedom are naturally alert to repel invasion of their liberty by evil-minded rulers.&nbsp;
1001     The greatest dangers to liberty lurk in insidious encroachment by men of zeal, well-meaning but without understanding.&quot;--Louis Dembitz Brandeis, lawyer, judge, and writer (1856-1941)
1002     </li>
1003    
1004     <li>
1005    
1006     &quot;When great changes occur in history, when great principles are involved, as a rule the majority are wrong.&quot;--Eugene V. Debs, American Socialist
1007     (1855-1926)
1008     </li>
1009    
1010     <li>
1011    
1012     &quot;I was court-martialled in my absence, and sentenced to death in my absence, so I said they could shoot me in my absence.&quot;--Brendan Francis Behan, playwright (1923-1964)
1013     </li>
1014    
1015     <li>
1016    
1017     &quot;It may be necessary temporarily to accept a lesser evil, but one must never label a necessary evil as good.&quot;--Margaret Mead, American anthropologist (1901-1978)
1018     </li>
1019    
1020     <li>
1021    
1022     &quot;Be master of your petty annoyances and conserve your energies for the big, worthwhile things.&nbsp;
1023     It isn't the mountain ahead that wears you out--it's the grain of sand in your shoe.&quot;--Robert Service, writer (1874-1958)
1024     </li>
1025    
1026     <li>
1027    
1028     &quot;Why is it that we rejoice at a birth and grieve at a funeral?&nbsp; It is because we are not the person involved.&quot;--Mark Twain, author and humorist (1835-1910)
1029     </li>
1030    
1031     <li>
1032    
1033     &quot;Money often costs too much.&quot;--Ralph Waldo Emerson, American essayist, poet and philosopher (1803-1882)
1034     </li>
1035    
1036     <li>
1037    
1038     &quot;By three methods we may learn wisdom:&nbsp; First, by reflection, which is noblest; second, by imitation, which is easiest; and third, by experience, which is the bitterest.&quot;--Confucius, philosopher and teacher (c. 551- 478 BCE)
1039     </li>
1040    
1041     <li>
1042    
1043     &quot;Until lions have their historians, tales of the hunt shall always glorify the hunter.&quot;--African
1044     proverb
1045     </li>
1046    
1047     <li>
1048    
1049     &quot;Life is a long lesson in humility.&quot;--James M. Barrie, writer (1860-1937)
1050     </li>
1051    
1052     <li>
1053    
1054     &quot;The man who is a pessimist before forty-eight knows too much; if he is an optimist after it, he knows too little.&quot;--Mark Twain, author (1835-1910)
1055     </li>
1056    
1057     <li>
1058    
1059     &quot;A government which robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend on the support of Paul.&quot;--George Bernard Shaw, writer, Nobel laureate (1856-1950)
1060     </li>
1061    
1062     <li>
1063    
1064     &quot;A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon without springs--jolted by every pebble in the road.&quot;--Henry Ward Beecher, preacher and writer (1813-1887)
1065     </li>
1066    
1067     <li>
1068    
1069     &quot;Lighthouses are more helpful than churches.&quot;--Benjamin Franklin (1706-1790)
1070     </li>
1071    
1072     <li>
1073    
1074     &quot;Sometimes to remain silent is to lie.&quot;--Miguel de Unamuno, philosopher and writer (1864-1936)
1075     </li>
1076    
1077     <li>
1078    
1079     &quot;Excuse my dust.&quot;--Dorothy Parker's own epitaph - poet, short-story writer, theater critic and screenwriter (1893-1967)
1080     </li>
1081    
1082     <li>
1083    
1084     &quot;Men seldom make passes at girls who wear glasses.&quot;--Dorothy Parker - poet, short-story writer, theater critic and screenwriter (1893-1967)
1085     </li>
1086    
1087     <li>
1088    
1089     &quot;If all the girls in attendance were laid end to end, I wouldn't be at all surprised.&quot;--Dorothy Parker responding to "Wasn't the Yale prom wonderful?" Poet, short-story writer, theater critic and screenwriter (1893-1967)
1090     </li>
1091    
1092     <li>
1093    
1094     &quot;You know, that woman speaks 18 languages, and she can't say 'no' in any of them.&quot;--Dorothy Parker - poet, short-story writer, theater critic and screenwriter (1893-1967)
1095     </li>
1096    
1097     <li>
1098    
1099     &quot;Brevity is the soul of lingerie.&quot;--Dorothy Parker - poet, short-story writer, theater critic and screenwriter (1893-1967)
1100     </li>
1101    
1102     <li>
1103    
1104     &quot;It's a small apartment, I've barely enough room to lay my hat and a few friends.&quot;--Dorothy Parker - poet, short-story writer, theater critic and screenwriter (1893-1967)
1105     </li>
1106    
1107     <li>
1108    
1109     &quot;One of the keys to happiness is a bad memory.&quot;--Rita Mae Brown, author (1944- )
1110     </li>
1111    
1112     <li>
1113    
1114     &quot;When a man wants to murder a tiger he calls it sport; when the tiger wants to murder him he calls it ferocity.&quot;--George Bernard Shaw, writer, Nobel laureate (1856-1950)
1115     </li>
1116    
1117     <li>
1118    
1119     &quot;Don't discuss yourself, for you are bound to lose; if you belittle yourself, you are believed; if you praise yourself, you are disbelieved.&quot;--Michel de Montaigne, essayist (1533-1592)
1120     </li>
1121    
1122     <li>
1123    
1124     &quot;Few men have virtue to withstand the highest bidder.&quot;--George Washington (1732-1799)
1125     </li>
1126    
1127     <li>
1128    
1129     &quot;Integrity without knowledge is weak and useless, and knowledge without integrity is dangerous and dreadful."--Samuel Johnson, English author, lexicographer (1709-1784)
1130     </li>
1131    
1132     <li>
1133    
1134     &quot;To have friends, you know, one need only be good-natured; but when a man has no enemy left there must be something mean about him.&quot;--Oscar Wilde, Anglo-Irish playwright, author (1854-1900)
1135     </li>
1136    
1137     <li>
1138    
1139     &quot;To have doubted one's own first principles is the mark of a civilized man.&quot;--Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr., poet, novelist, essayist, and physician (1809-1894)
1140     </li>
1141    
1142     <li>
1143    
1144     &quot;If I have been able to see further, it was only because I stood on the shoulders of giants.&quot;--Isaac Newton, mathematician, physicist (1642-1727)
1145     </li>
1146    
1147     <li>
1148    
1149     &quot;Education is a progressive discovery of our own ignorance.&quot;--Will Durant, historian (1885-1981)
1150     </li>
1151    
1152     <li>
1153    
1154     &quot;Every woman is a 10; it just depends on what base you're counting in.&quot;--Unknown
1155     </li>
1156    
1157     <li>
1158    
1159     &quot;Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power.&quot;--Abraham Lincoln, statesman, US President (1809-1865)
1160     </li>
1161    
1162     <li>
1163    
1164     &quot;Every society honors its live conformists and its dead troublemakers.&quot;--Mignon McLaughlin, author
1165     </li>
1166    
1167     <li>
1168    
1169     &quot;Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic.&quot;--Arthur C. Clarke
1170     </li>
1171    
1172     <li>
1173    
1174     &quot;When men are most sure and arrogant, they are commonly the most mistaken.&quot;--David Hume, philosopher, historian (1711-1776)
1175     </li>
1176    
1177     <li>
1178    
1179     &quot;The hottest places in hell are reserved for those who, in time of great moral crisis, maintain their neutrality.&quot;--Dante Alighieri, poet (1265 -1321)
1180     </li>
1181    
1182     <li>&quot;I long to accomplish a great and noble task; but it is my chief duty to accomplish small tasks as if they were great and noble.&quot;--Helen Keller, deaf & blind lecturer (1880-1968)
1183     </li>
1184    
1185     <li>
1186    
1187     &quot;I'm proud to pay taxes in the United States; the only thing is, I could be just as proud for half the money.&quot;--Arthur Godfrey
1188     </li>
1189    
1190     <li>
1191    
1192     &quot;Walking is also an ambulation of mind.&quot;--Gretel Ehrlich, novelist, poet, and essayist (1946- )
1193     </li>
1194    
1195     <li>
1196    
1197     &quot;Every saint has a past and every sinner a future.&quot;--Oscar Wilde, writer (1854-1900)
1198     </li>
1199    
1200     <li>&quot;Good judgment comes from experience, and often experience comes from bad judgment.&quot;--Rita Mae Brown, American writer and playwright
1201     </li>
1202    
1203     <li>
1204    
1205     &quot;People are like stained glass windows: they sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in their true beauty is revealed only if there is a light within.&quot;--Elizabeth Kubler-Ross, psychiatrist and author (1926- )
1206     </li>
1207    
1208     <li>
1209    
1210     &quot;Too many have dispensed with generosity in order to practice charity.&quot;--Albert Camus (1913-1960)
1211     </li>
1212    
1213     <li>
1214    
1215     &quot;Egotism is the anesthetic that dulls the pain of stupidity.&quot;--Frank Leahy
1216     </li>
1217    
1218     <li>
1219    
1220     &quot;When I was a boy I was told that anybody could become President.&nbsp; Now I'm beginning to believe
1221     it.&quot;--Clarence Darrow, lawyer, author (1857-1938)
1222     </li>
1223    
1224     <li>
1225    
1226     &quot;Since Auschwitz we know what man is capable of.&nbsp; And since Hiroshima we know what is at stake.&quot;--Viktor Frankl, author, neurologist and psychiatrist, Holocaust survivor (1905-1997)
1227     </li>
1228    
1229     <li>
1230    
1231     &quot;Choosing the lesser of two evils, is still choosing evil&quot;--Christopher Hampton, British playwright
1232     </li>
1233    
1234     <li>
1235    
1236     &quot;When choosing between two evils, I always like to try the one I've never tried before.&quot;--Mae West
1237     </li>
1238    
1239     <li>
1240    
1241     &quot;Tact is the ability to describe others as they see themselves.&quot;--Abraham Lincoln, statesman, US President (1809-1865)
1242     </li>
1243    
1244     <li>
1245    
1246     &quot;Never mistake motion for action.&quot;--Ernest Hemingway, writer, journalist (1899-1961)
1247     </li>
1248    
1249     <li>
1250    
1251     &quot;The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing.&nbsp; If you can fake that, you've got it made.&quot;--Groucho Marx
1252     </li>
1253    
1254     <li>
1255    
1256     &quot;Love your enemies, for they tell you your faults.&quot;--Benjamin Franklin, statesman, philosopher, journalist (1706-1790)
1257     </li>
1258    
1259     <li>
1260    
1261     &quot;Pay attention to your enemies, for they are the first to discover your mistakes.&quot;--Antisthenes, Greek philosopher (ca 445- ca 365 BCE)
1262     </li>
1263    
1264     <li>
1265    
1266     &quot;Cannibals prefer those who have no spines.&quot;--Stanislaw Lem
1267     </li>
1268    
1269     <li>
1270    
1271     &quot;I was reading the dictionary.&nbsp; I thought it was a poem about everything.&quot;--Steven Wright, comedian (1955- ?)
1272     </li>
1273    
1274     <li>
1275    
1276     &quot;When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear.&quot;--Mark Twain, writer, philosopher (1835-1910)
1277     </li>
1278    
1279     <li>
1280    
1281     &quot;The least initial deviation from the truth is multiplied later a thousand-fold.&quot;--Aristotle, philosopher (ca 384- ca 322 BCE)
1282     </li>
1283    
1284     <li> &quot;I didn't know he was one of the first lawyers!&nbsp; The first human who hurled an insult instead of a stone was the founder of civilization.&quot;--Sigmund Freud, neurologist, founder of psychoanalysis (1856-1939)
1285     </li>
1286    
1287     <li>
1288    
1289     &quot;Trust in Allah, but tie your camel.&quot;--Arabic saying
1290     </li>
1291    
1292     <li>
1293    
1294     &quot;In the midst of great joy, do not promise anyone anything.&nbsp; In the midst of great anger, do not answer anyone's letter.&quot;--Chinese proverb
1295     </li>
1296    
1297     <li>
1298    
1299     &quot;It is not what we do, but also what we do not do, for which we are accountable.&quot;--Moliere, playwright (1622-1673)
1300     </li>
1301    
1302     <li>
1303    
1304     &quot;When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around.&nbsp;
1305     But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years.&quot;--Mark Twain, author, philosopher (1835-1910)
1306     </li>
1307    
1308     <li>
1309    
1310     &quot;I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying that I approved of it.&quot;--Mark Twain, author, philosopher (1835-1910)
1311     </li>
1312    
1313     <li>
1314    
1315     &quot;Familiarity breeds contempt--and children.&quot;--Mark Twain, author, philosopher (1835-1910)
1316     </li>
1317    
1318     <li>&quot;Facts are stubborn, but statistics are more pliable.&quot;--Mark Twain, author, philosopher (1835-1910)
1319     </li>
1320    
1321     <li>
1322    
1323     &quot;The past may not repeat itself, but it sure does rhyme.&quot;--Mark Twain, author, philosopher (1835-1910)
1324     </li>
1325    
1326     <li>
1327    
1328     &quot;I have no color prejudices nor caste prejudices nor creed prejudices.&nbsp;
1329     All I care to know is that a man is a human being, and that is enough for me; he can't be any worse.&quot;--Mark Twain, author, philosopher (1835-1910)
1330     </li>
1331    
1332     <li>
1333    
1334     &quot;Whenever you find that you are on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect.&quot;--Mark Twain, author, philosopher (1835-1910)
1335     </li>
1336    
1337     <li>
1338    
1339     &quot;Duct tape is like the force.&nbsp; It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the universe
1340     together ...&quot;--Carl Zwanzig
1341     </li>
1342    
1343     <li>
1344    
1345     &quot;Be careful of reading health books, you might die of a misprint.&quot;--Mark Twain, author, philosopher (1835-1910)
1346     </li>
1347    
1348     <li>
1349    
1350     &quot;There are three kinds of lies:&nbsp; lies, damn lies, and statistics.&quot;--Mark Twain (1835-1910)
1351     </li>
1352    
1353     <li>
1354    
1355     &quot;In America, anybody can be president.&nbsp; That's one of the risks you take.&quot;--Adlai Stevenson, statesman (1900-1965)
1356     </li>
1357    
1358     <li>
1359    
1360     &quot;There is more stupidity than hydrogen in the universe, and it has a longer shelf life.&quot;--Frank Zappa
1361     </li>
1362    
1363     <li>
1364    
1365     &quot;Black holes are where God divided by zero.&quot;--Steven Wright, comedian (1955- ?)
1366     </li>
1367    
1368     <li>
1369    
1370     &quot;If you believe everything you read, better not read.&quot;--Japanese proverb
1371     </li>
1372    
1373     <li>
1374    
1375     &quot;A man cannot be too careful in the choice of his enemies.&quot;--Oscar Wilde, writer (1854-1900)
1376     </li>
1377    
1378     <li>
1379    
1380     &quot;So you're the man who can't spell fuck.&quot;--Dorothy Parker to Norman Mailer (he had been convinced by his publisher to use "fug"
1381     instead) Poet, short-story writer, theater critic and screenwriter (1893-1967)
1382     </li>
1383    
1384     <li>
1385    
1386     &quot;You can lead a horticulture but you can't make her think&quot;--Dorothy Parker - poet, short-story writer, theater critic and screenwriter (1893-1967)
1387     </li>
1388    
1389     <li>
1390    
1391     &quot;Fame is a vapor; popularity an accident; the only earthly certainty is oblivion.&quot;--Mark Twain, author, philosopher (1835-1910)
1392     </li>
1393    
1394     <li>
1395    
1396     &quot;We forbid any course that says we restrict free speech.&quot;--Kathleen Dixon, Director of women's studies department, Bowling Green State Univ. on disallowing the teaching of a course on Political Correctness
1397     </li>
1398    
1399     <li>
1400    
1401     &quot;Give me ambiguity or give me something else.&quot;--Unattributed
1402     </li>
1403    
1404     <li>
1405    
1406     &quot;Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards.&quot;--Soren Kierkegaard, philosopher, theologian (1813-1855)
1407     </li>
1408    
1409     <li>
1410    
1411     &quot;We are not retreating--we are advancing in another direction.&quot;--General Douglas MacArthur (1880-1964)
1412     </li>
1413    
1414     <li>
1415    
1416     &quot;Adults are obsolete children.&quot;--Dr. Seuss (1904-1991)
1417     </li>
1418    
1419     <li>
1420    
1421     &quot;The optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds; and the pessimist fears this is true.&quot;--James Branch Cabell
1422     </li>
1423    
1424     <li>
1425    
1426     &quot;It should be done with the same degree of alacrity and nonchalance that you would display in authorizing a highly intelligent trained bear to remove your appendix.&quot;--Dan Greenberg
1427     </li>
1428    
1429     <li>
1430    
1431     &quot;To keep your marriage brimming,
1432     With love in the loving cup,
1433     Whenever you're wrong, admit it;
1434     Whenever you're right, shut up.&quot;--Ogden Nash, poet (1902-1971)
1435     </li>
1436    
1437     <li>
1438    
1439     &quot;Having served on various committees, I have drawn up a list of rules:
1440     · Never arrive on time; this stamps you as a beginner.
1441     · Don't say anything until the meeting is half over; this stamps you as being wise.
1442     · Be as vague as possible; this avoids irritating the others.
1443     · When in doubt, suggest that a subcommittee be appointed.
1444     · Be the first to move for adjournment; this will make you popular; it's what everyone is waiting for.&quot;--Harry Chapman
1445     </li>
1446    
1447     <li>
1448    
1449     &quot;Take care of those who work for you and you'll float to greatness on their achievements.&quot;--H.S.M. Burns
1450     </li>
1451    
1452     <li>
1453    
1454     &quot;A remarkable thing about Shakespeare is that he is really very good in spite of all the people who say he is very good.&quot;--Robert Graves
1455     </li>
1456    
1457     <li>
1458    
1459     &quot;Television has done much for psychiatry, by spreading information about it as well as contributing to the need for it.&quot;--Alfred Hitchcock
1460     </li>
1461    
1462     <li>
1463    
1464     &quot;The first principle is that you must not fool yourself--and you are the easiest person to fool.&quot;--Richard Feynman, physicist (1918-1988)
1465     </li>
1466    
1467     <li>
1468    
1469     &quot;What if this weren't a hypothetical question?&quot;--Unattributed
1470     </li>
1471    
1472     <li>
1473    
1474     &quot;Everywhere is walking distance ... if you have the time.&quot;--Steven Wright, comedian (1955- ?)
1475     </li>
1476    
1477     <li>
1478    
1479     &quot;He who asks is a fool for five minutes, but he who does not ask remains a fool forever.&quot;--Chinese proverb
1480     </li>
1481    
1482     <li>
1483    
1484     &quot;It is not enough to have a good mind.&nbsp; The main thing is to use it well.&quot;--Rene Descartes, mathematician, philosopher (1596-1650) in "Le Discours de la Methode," 1637
1485     </li>
1486    
1487     <li>
1488    
1489     &quot;Experience is the comb life gives you after you lose your hair.&quot;--Judith Stearn
1490     </li>
1491    
1492     <li>
1493    
1494     &quot;Life is pleasant.&nbsp; Death is peaceful.&nbsp; It's the transition that's troublesome.&quot;--Isaac
1495     Asimov, science-fiction writer (1920-1992)
1496     </li>
1497    
1498     <li>
1499    
1500     &quot;It is curious that physical courage should be so common in the world and moral courage so rare.&quot;--Mark Twain, author and humorist (1835-1910)
1501     </li>
1502    
1503     <li>
1504    
1505     &quot;It is criminal to steal a purse, daring to steal a fortune, a mark of greatness to steal a crown.&nbsp;
1506     The blame diminishes as the guilt increases.&quot;--Johan Christoph Friedrich von Schiller, poet and dramatist (1759-1805)
1507     </li>
1508    
1509     <li>
1510    
1511     &quot;There is no pleasure in having nothing to do; the fun is in having lots to do and not doing it.&quot;--Mary Little
1512     </li>
1513    
1514     <li>
1515    
1516     &quot;I generally avoid temptation unless I can't resist it.&quot;--Mae West
1517     </li>
1518    
1519     <li>
1520    
1521     &quot;I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage.&nbsp;
1522     They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.&quot;--Rita
1523     Rudner, comedian
1524     </li>
1525    
1526     <li>
1527    
1528     &quot;I know I am among civilized men because they are fighting so savagely.&quot;--Voltaire, write (1694-1778)
1529     </li>
1530    
1531     <li>
1532    
1533     &quot;If it's fact, it ain't brag.&quot;--Dizzy Dean
1534     </li>
1535    
1536     <li>
1537    
1538     &quot;By all means marry.&nbsp; If you get a good wife, you'll be happy.&nbsp; If you get a bad one, you'll become a
1539     philosopher.&quot;--Socrates, philosopher, teacher (ca 470- ca 399 BCE)
1540     </li>
1541    
1542     <li>
1543    
1544     &quot;I think ... I think it's in my basement.&nbsp; Let me go upstairs and check.&quot;--M.C. Escher, artist (1898-1972)
1545     </li>
1546    
1547     <li>
1548    
1549     &quot;Children aren't happy without something to ignore.&nbsp; And that's what parents were created for.&quot;--Ogden Nash, poet (1902-1971)
1550     </li>
1551    
1552     <li>
1553    
1554     &quot;I find that principles have no real force except when one is well fed.&quot;--Mark Twain, author, humorist (1835-1910)
1555     </li>
1556    
1557     <li>
1558    
1559     &quot;Say not, 'I have found the truth,' but rather, 'I have found a truth.&quot;--Kahlil Gibran (1883-1931)
1560     </li>
1561    
1562     <li>
1563    
1564     &quot;A leader who keeps his ear to the ground allows his rear end to become a target.&quot;--Angie Papadakis
1565     </li>
1566    
1567     <li>
1568    
1569     &quot;Science is built with facts as a house is with stones--but a collection of facts is no more a science than a heap of stones is a house.&quot;--Jules Henry Poincare (1854-1912)
1570     </li>
1571    
1572     <li>
1573    
1574     &quot;Wit is educated insolence.&quot;--Aristotle, philosopher (ca 384- ca 322 BCE)
1575     </li>
1576    
1577     <li>
1578    
1579     &quot;As scarce as truth is, the supply has always been in excess of the demand.&quot;--Josh Billings
1580     </li>
1581    
1582     <li>
1583    
1584     &quot;A practical man is a man who practices the errors of his forefathers.&quot;--Lord Beaconsfield
1585     </li>
1586    
1587     <li>
1588    
1589     &quot;Teachers open the door, but you must enter by yourself.&quot;--Chinese Proverb
1590     </li>
1591    
1592     <li>
1593    
1594     &quot;Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear--not absence of fear.&quot;--
1595     Mark Twain, author, humorist (1835-1910)
1596     </li>
1597    
1598     <li>
1599    
1600     &quot;Pessimist:&nbsp; One who, when he has the choice of two evils, chooses both.&quot;--
1601     Oscar Wilde, writer, playwright (1854-1900)
1602     </li>
1603    
1604     <li>
1605    
1606     &quot;There is a very fine line between 'hobby' and 'mental illness'.&quot;--Dave Barry
1607     </li>
1608    
1609     <li>
1610    
1611     &quot;There is far more opportunity than there is ability.&quot;--Thomas Edison, inventor (1847-1931)
1612     </li>
1613    
1614     <li>
1615    
1616     &quot;A great deal of intelligence can be invested in ignorance when the need for illusion is deep.&quot;--Saul Belloe
1617     </li>
1618    
1619     <li>
1620    
1621     &quot;I have one share in corporate Earth, and I am nervous about the management.&quot;--E.B. White
1622     </li>
1623    
1624     <li>
1625    
1626     &quot;They called me mad, and I called them mad, and damn them, they outvoted me.&quot;--Nathaniel Lee (on being consigned to a mental institution, circa 17th c.)
1627     </li>
1628    
1629     <li>
1630    
1631     &quot;There are two ways to slide easily through life: to believe everything or to doubt everything; both ways save us from thinking.&quot;--Theodore Rubin
1632     </li>
1633    
1634     <li>
1635    
1636     &quot;When you want to test the depths of a stream, don't use both feet.&quot;--Chinese Proverb
1637     </li>
1638    
1639     <li>
1640    
1641     &quot;A man does not have to be an angel in order to be saint.&quot;--Albert Schweitzer, theologian, philosopher, missionary, physician (1875-1965)
1642     </li>
1643    
1644     <li>
1645    
1646     &quot;Only put off until tomorrow what you are willing to die having left undone.&quot;--Pablo Picasso, artist (1881-1973)
1647     </li>
1648    
1649     <li>
1650    
1651     &quot;There is a point beyond which even justice becomes unjust.&quot;--Sophocles, slave, philosopher, teacher (ca 495? - ca 406 BCE)
1652     </li>
1653    
1654     <li>
1655    
1656     &quot;Television is an invention whereby you can be entertained in your living room by people you wouldn't have in your house.&quot;--David Frost
1657     </li>
1658    
1659     <li>
1660    
1661     &quot;A child on the farm sees a plane fly overhead and dreams of a faraway place.&nbsp;
1662     A traveler on the plane sees the farmhouse and thinks of home.&quot;--Carl Burns
1663     </li>
1664    
1665     <li>
1666    
1667     &quot;If you would not be forgotten as soon as you are gone, either write things worth reading or do things worth writing.&quot;--Benjamin Franklin, author, statesman (1706-1790)
1668     </li>
1669    
1670     <li>
1671    
1672     &quot;Adolescence is a period of rapid changes.&nbsp; Between the ages of 12 and 17, for example, a parent ages 20 years.&quot;--Changing Times magazine
1673     </li>
1674    
1675     <li>
1676    
1677     &quot;In theory, there is no difference between theory and practice.&nbsp; But, in practice, there is.&quot;--Jan L.A. van de Snepscheut
1678     </li>
1679    
1680     <li>
1681    
1682     &quot;An education isn't how much you have committed to memory, or even how much you know.&nbsp;
1683     It's being able to differentiate between what you know and what you don't.&quot;--Anatole France
1684     </li>
1685    
1686     <li>
1687    
1688     &quot;It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it.&quot;--Aristotle, philosopher (ca 384- ca 322 BCE)
1689     </li>
1690    
1691     <li>
1692    
1693     &quot;Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please.&quot;--Mark Twain, author, humorist (1835-1910)
1694     </li>
1695    
1696     <li>
1697    
1698     &quot;When you say that you agree to a thing in principle, you mean that you have not the slightest intention of carrying it out.&quot;--Otto von Bismarck, 1st chancellor of German Empire (1815-1898)
1699     </li>
1700    
1701     <li>
1702    
1703     &quot;There are two things that you should never see being made: sausage, and... a political deal.&quot;--Otto von Bismarck (paraphrased) , 1st chancellor of German Empire (1815-1898)
1704     </li>
1705    
1706     <li>
1707    
1708     &quot;Nothing is at last sacred but the integrity of your own mind.&quot;--Ralph Waldo Emerson, essayist, poet (1803-1882)
1709     </li>
1710    
1711     <li>
1712    
1713     &quot;Lottery:&nbsp; a tax on people who are bad at math.&quot;--Unattributed
1714     </li>
1715    
1716     <li>
1717    
1718     &quot;The best index to a person's character is how he treats people who can't do him any good, and how he treats people who can't fight back.&quot;--Abigail Van Buren
1719     </li>
1720    
1721     <li>
1722    
1723     &quot;Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power.&quot;--Abraham Lincoln
1724     </li>
1725    
1726     <li>
1727    
1728     &quot;A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds, adored by little statesmen and philosophers and divines.&nbsp;
1729     With consistency, a great soul has simply nothing to do.&quot;--Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803 -1882)
1730     </li>
1731    
1732     <li>
1733    
1734     &quot;All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then success is sure.&quot;--Mark Twain (1835 -1910)
1735     </li>
1736    
1737     <li>
1738    
1739     &quot;When you look at Prince Charles, don't you think that someone in the Royal family knew someone in the Royal family?&quot;--Robin Williams
1740     </li>
1741    
1742     <li>
1743    
1744     &quot;Man is the best computer we can put aboard a spacecraft--and the only one that can be mass produced with unskilled labor.&quot;--Werner von Braun, rocket engineer (1912-1977)
1745     </li>
1746    
1747     </ul>
1748     <hr>
1749     <p><b><u><a name="hard_work"></a>Hard Work</u></b></p>
1750     <ul>
1751     <li>"The only place where <i>success</i> comes before <i>work</i> is in
1752     the dictionary."--Vidal Sassoon</li>
1753     </ul>
1754     <hr>
1755     <p><b><u><a name="hum_nat_soc_int"></a>Human Nature And Social Interactions</u></b></p>
1756     <ul>
1757     <li>"Anyone can be a barbarian; it requires a terrible effort to remain a
1758     civilized man."--Leonard Sidney Woolf</li>
1759     <li>"People start to diet when their stomachs stick out further than their
1760     dickiedoos."--Andy Sipowicz, \emph{NYPD Blue}.</li>
1761     <li>"Feeling guilty is one thing; looking guilty is something entirely
1762     different."--Dylan McCabe, \emph{Beverly Hills 90210}, airdate 04/00.</li>
1763     <li>"Unconfronted behavior will continue."--Unknown</li>
1764     <li>"It is easier to ask forgiveness than permission."--Unknown</li>
1765     <li>"How far you go in life, depends on your being Tender with the young,
1766     Compassionate with the Aged, Sympathetic with the Striving and Tolerant of the
1767     Weak and the Strong. Because, someday in life you will have been all of these."--George Washington Carver.</li>
1768     <li>"Simplicity of character is the natural result of profound thought."--From A Chinese Restaurant Fortune Cookie, 01/26/01
1769     </li>
1770     <li>"A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds."--Ralph
1771     Waldo Emerson
1772     </li>
1773     </ul>
1774     <hr>
1775     <p><b><u><a name="histfig_napoleon"></a>Historical Figures, Napoleon</u></b></p>
1776     <ul>
1777     <li>&quot;[A]ny commander in chief who undertakes to carry out a plan which he
1778     considers defective is at fault; he must put forth his reasons, insist on the
1779     plan being changed, and finally tender his resignation rather than be the
1780     instrument of his army's downfall.&quot;--Napoleon</li>
1781     </ul>
1782     <hr>
1783     <p><b><u><a name="marriage_fav_manview"></a>Marriage (Favorable, From The Man's Point Of
1784     View)</u></b></p>
1785     <ul>
1786     <li>"A psychiatrist is a person who will give you expensive answers that
1787     your wife will give you for free."--Anonymous</li>
1788     </ul>
1789     <hr>
1790     <p><b><u><a name="marriage_unfav_genderless"></a>Marriage (Unfavorable,
1791     Genderless)</u></b></p>
1792     <ul>
1793     <li>"Marriage is a three ring circus: engagement-ring, wedding-ring, suffer-ing.&quot;--Unknown</li>
1794     <li>"When a newly married couple smiles, everyone knows why. When a
1795     ten-year married couple smiles, everyone wonders why."--Unknown</li>
1796     <li>"Love is blind but marriage is an eye-opener."--Unknown</li>
1797     <li>"When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of
1798     one thing: either the car or the wife is new."--Unknown</li>
1799     </ul>
1800     <hr>
1801     <p><b><u><a name="marriage_unfav_manview"></a>Marriage (Unfavorable, From The Man's Point Of
1802     View)</u></b></p>
1803     <ul>
1804     <li>"Every man should get married some time; after all, happiness is not
1805     the only thing in life!"--Anonymous</li>
1806     <li>"An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have; the older she
1807     gets the more interested he is in her.&quot;--Agatha Christie</li>
1808     <li>"Bachelors should be heavily taxed.&nbsp; It is not fair that some men
1809     should be happier than others."--Oscar Wilde</li>
1810     <li>"Don't marry for money; you can borrow it cheaper."--Scottish
1811     Proverb</li>
1812     <li>"I don't worry about terrorism.&nbsp; I was married for two years."--Sam
1813     Kinison</li>
1814     <li>"Bachelors know more about women than married men; if they didn't,
1815     they'd be married too."--H. L. Mencken</li>
1816     <li>"Men have a better time than women; for one thing, they marry later;
1817     for another thing, they die earlier."--H. L. Mencken</li>
1818     <li>"A man without a woman is like a fish without a bicycle."--U2</li>
1819     <li>"I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back."--Anonymous</li>
1820     <li>&quot;I asked my wife, 'Where do you want to go for our
1821     anniversary?'&nbsp; She
1822     said, 'Somewhere I have never been!'&nbsp; I told her, 'How about the
1823     kitchen?'&quot;--Unknown</li>
1824     <li>"We always hold hands.&nbsp; If I let go, she shops."--Unknown</li>
1825     <li>"My wife was in beauty saloon for two hours.&nbsp; That was only for the estimate."--Unknown</li>
1826     <li>"She got a mudpack and looked great for two days.&nbsp; Then the mud fell off."--Unknown</li>
1827     <li>&quot;She ran after the garbage truck, yelling, 'Am I too late for the
1828     garbage?'&nbsp; Following her down the street I yelled, 'No, jump
1829     in!'&quot;--Unknown</li>
1830     <li>&quot;Badd Teddy recently explained to me why he refuses to ever get married.&nbsp;
1831     He said, 'the wedding rings look too much like minature handcuffs
1832     ...'&quot;--Unknown</li>
1833     <li>"If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at
1834     the front door, who do you let in first?&nbsp; The dog of course...!!!&nbsp; At least he'll
1835     shut up after you let him in!"--Unknown</li>
1836     <li>&quot;A man placed some flowers on the grave of his dearly departed mother
1837     and started back toward his car when his attention was diverted to another man
1838     kneeling at a grave.&nbsp; The man seemed to be praying with profound intensity and
1839     kept repeating,&nbsp; 'Why did you have to die? Why did you have to die?'&nbsp; The first
1840     man approached him and said, 'Sir, I don't wish to interfere with your private
1841     grief, but this demonstration of pain is more than I've ever seen before.&nbsp; For
1842     whom do you mourn so deeply? A child? A parent?'&nbsp; The mourner took a moment to
1843     collect himself then replied, 'My wife's first husband.'&quot;--Unknown</li>
1844     <li>&quot;A couple came upon a wishing well.&nbsp; The husband leaned over, made a wish
1845     and threw in a penny.&nbsp; The wife decided to make a wish, too.&nbsp; But she leaned over
1846     too much; fell into the well and drowned.&nbsp; The husband was stunned for a while
1847     but smiled 'It really works!'&quot;--Unknown</li>
1848     <li>&quot;Before marriage, a man yearns for the woman he loves.&nbsp; After marriage,
1849     the 'y' becomes silent.&quot;--Unknown</li>
1850     </ul>
1851     <hr>
1852     <p><b><u><a name="microsoft"></a>Microsoft</u></b></p>
1853     <ul>
1854     <li>"Not using Microsoft products is like being a non-smoker 40 or 50
1855     years ago:&nbsp; you can choose not to smoke, yourself, but it's hard to avoid
1856     second-hand smoke."--M. Tiemann (from an e-mail footer belonging to
1857     Rick Moen--I do not know who M. Tiemann is)</li>
1858     <li>&quot;I sense much NT in you.&nbsp; NT leads to Bluescreen.&nbsp; Bluescreen
1859     leads to downtime.&nbsp; Downtime leads to suffering.&nbsp; NT is the path to the
1860     darkside.&nbsp; Powerful Unix is."--From an SSH mailing list post by <a href="mailto:lorenl@alzatex.com"> Loren
1861     Lang</a> in 12/2001.</li>
1862     <li>"The best way to accelerate a computer running Windows is at 9.8 m/sec<sup>2</sup>.&quot;--From an e-mail footer used by
1863     <a href="mailto:tlaane@lucent.com"> Thomas Laane</a> in 02/2002.</li>
1864     <li>&quot;Mr. Ballmer, Microsoft's chief executive, once referred to Linux's
1865     licensing as 'a cancer that attaches itself in an intellectual property sense to
1866     everything it touches.'&quot;--From a <a href="http://www.nytimes.com" target="_blank">New
1867     York Times</a> article by Thomas Fuller entitled <i>How Microsoft Warded Off Rival</i> on May 15,
1868     2003</li>
1869     <li>&quot;Failure is not an option, it comes bundled with your Microsoft
1870     product.&quot;--From an e-mail footer used by <a href="mailto:news@tux.com.au">Henry
1871     Phillips</a> in May, 2003</li>
1872    
1873     <li>
1874    
1875     &quot;
1876    
1877     Who needs horror movies when we have Microsoft?&quot;-- Christine Comaford, PC Week, 27 Sep 1995
1878     </li>
1879    
1880     <li>
1881    
1882     &quot;
1883    
1884     Where do you want to go today?&nbsp; It doesn't matter, you're coming with us.&quot;-- Microsoft
1885     </li>
1886    
1887     </ul>
1888     <hr>
1889     <p><b><u><a name="old_age"></a>Old Age</u></b></p>
1890     <ul>
1891     <li>&quot;Inside every older person is a younger person--wondering what the hell
1892     happened.--Cora Harvey Armstrong.</li>
1893     <li>&quot;The hardest years in life are those between ten and seventy.&quot;--Helen Hayes (at
1894     73)</li>
1895     <li>&quot;I refuse to think of them as chin hairs. I think of them as stray eyebrows.&quot;--Janette
1896     Barber</li>
1897     <li>&quot;Things are going to get a lot worse before they get
1898     worse.&quot;--Lily Tomlin</li>
1899     <li>&quot;A male gynecologist is like an auto mechanic who never owned a car.&quot;--Carrie
1900     Snow</li>
1901     <li>&quot;Old age ain't no place for sissies.&quot;--Bette Davis</li>
1902     <li>&quot;Thirty-five is when you finally get your head together and your body starts
1903     falling apart.&quot;--Caryn Leschen</li>
1904     </ul>
1905     <hr>
1906     <p><b><u><a name="pets_cats"></a>Pets, Cats</u></b></p>
1907     <ul>
1908     <li>"There is no snooze button on a cat who wants breakfast."--Unknown</li>
1909     <li>"Thousands of years ago, cats were worshipped as gods.&nbsp; Cats have never
1910     forgotten this."--Unknown</li>
1911     <li>"Cats are smarter than dogs.&nbsp; You can't get eight cats to pull a sled
1912     through snow."--Jeff Valdez</li>
1913     <li>"As every cat owner knows, nobody owns a cat."--Ellen Perry Berkeley</li>
1914     <li>"Dogs come when they are called; cats take a message and get back to
1915     you later."--Mary Bly</li>
1916     <li>"Cats are rather delicate creatures and they are subject to a good
1917     many ailments, but I never heard of one who suffered from insomnia."--Joseph
1918     Wood Krutch</li>
1919     <li>"There are many intelligent species in the universe.&nbsp; They are all
1920     owned by cats."--Unknown</li>
1921     <li>"I have studied many philosophers and many cats.&nbsp; The wisdom of cats is
1922     infinitely superior.&quot;--Hippolyte Taine</li>
1923     <li>"Dogs believe they are human.&nbsp; Cats believe they are God."--Unknown</li>
1924     <li>"You can train a cat to do anything it wants to do."--Unknown</li>
1925     </ul>
1926     <hr>
1927     <p><b><u><a name="philo_aristotle"></a>Philosophers, Aristotle</u></b></p>
1928     <ul>
1929     <li>"It is best that laws should be so constructed as to leave as little
1930     as possible to the decision of those who judge."--Aristotle, <i>Rhetoric</i></li>
1931     <li>"We are what we repeatedly do.&nbsp; Excellence, then is not an act, but a habit."--Aristotle</li>
1932     <li>"Moral excellence comes about as a result of habit.&nbsp; We become just by
1933     doing just acts, temperate by doing temperate acts, brave by doing brave acts."--Aristotle</li>
1934     <li>"Happiness is the exercise of vital powers along lines of excellence,
1935     in a life affording them scope."--Aristotle</li>
1936     </ul>
1937     <hr>
1938     <p><b><u><a name="philo_henry_david_thoreau"></a>Philosophers, Henry David
1939     Thoreau</u></b></p>
1940     <ul>
1941     <li>"There is no rule more invariable than that we are paid for our
1942     suspicions by finding what we suspect."--Henry David Thoreau</li>
1943     </ul>
1944     <hr>
1945     <p><b><u><a name="police_and_law_enforcement"></a>Police And Law Enforcement</u></b></p>
1946     <ul>
1947     <li>"The handcuffs are tight because they're new. They'll stretch out
1948     after you wear them awhile."--From a humorous e-mail entitled <i>Funny
1949     Police Quotes</i> received around 04/08/00.</li>
1950     <li>"If you run, you'll only go to jail tired."--From a humorous e-mail
1951     entitled <i>Funny
1952     Police Quotes</i> received around 04/08/00.</li>
1953     <li>"So, you don't know how fast you were going. I guess that means I can
1954     write anything I want on the ticket, huh?"--From a humorous e-mail entitled <i>Funny
1955     Police Quotes</i> received around 04/08/00.</li>
1956     <li>"Yes sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don't think it
1957     will help.&nbsp; Oh, did I mention that I am the shift supervisor?"--From a humorous
1958     e-mail entitled <i>Funny
1959     Police Quotes</i> received around 04/08/00.</li>
1960     <li>"Warning!&nbsp; You want a warning? O.K., I'm warning you not to do that
1961     again or I'll give you another ticket."--From a humorous e-mail entitled <i>Funny
1962     Police Quotes</i> received around 04/08/00.</li>
1963     <li>"The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk
1964     or not.&nbsp; Was Mickey Mouse a cat or dog?"--From a humorous e-mail entitled <i>Funny
1965     Police Quotes</i> received around 04/08/00.</li>
1966     <li>"Yeah, we have a quota.&nbsp; Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster oven."--From a humorous e-mail entitled
1967     <i>Funny
1968     Police Quotes</i> received
1969     around 04/08/00.</li>
1970     <li>"Life's tough, it's tougher if you're stupid."--From a humorous
1971     e-mail entitled <i>Funny
1972     Police Quotes</i> received around 04/08/00.</li>
1973     <li>"No sir, we don't have quotas anymore.&nbsp; We used to have quotas, but now
1974     we're allowed to write as many tickets as we want."--From a humorous e-mail
1975     entitled <i>Funny
1976     Police Quotes</i> received around 04/08/00.</li>
1977     <li>"Just how big were those two beers?"--From a humorous e-mail
1978     entitled <i>Funny
1979     Police Quotes</i> received around 04/08/00.</li>
1980     <li>"In God we trust, all others are suspects."--From a humorous e-mail
1981     entitled <i>Funny
1982     Police Quotes</i> received around 04/08/00.</li>
1983     </ul>
1984     <hr>
1985     <p><b><u><a name="politfig_winston_churchill"></a>Political Figures, Winston
1986     Churchill</u></b></p>
1987     <ul>
1988     <li>"True genius resides in the capacity for evaluation of uncertain,
1989     hazardous, and conflicting information."--Winston Churchill</li>
1990     </ul>
1991     <hr>
1992     <p><b><u><a name="polit_fig_bill_hilary_clinton"></a>Political Figures, Bill And Hilary
1993     Clinton</u></b></p>
1994     <ul>
1995     <li>"I'm not going to have some reporters pawing through our papers. We
1996     are the president."--Hillary Clinton (commenting on the release of subpoenaed documents)</li>
1997     </ul>
1998     <hr>
1999     <p><b><u><a name="politfig_al_gore"></a>Political Figures, Al Gore</u></b></p>
2000     <ul>
2001     <li>"Y'all know how I feel about Al Gore--he's as dull as sober
2002     missionary sex with someone you know.&quot;--<i>Saturday Night Live</i> comedian
2003     impersonating President Bill Clinton, broadcast date 04/01/00.</li>
2004     <li>"A zebra
2005     does not change its spots."--Al Gore</li>
2006     </ul>
2007     <hr>
2008     <p><b><u><a name="politfig_henry_kissinger"></a>Political Figures, Henry
2009     Kissinger</u></b></p>
2010     <ul>
2011     <li>"There cannot be a crisis next week. My schedule is already full."--Henry Kissinger</li>
2012     <li>"Even paranoid people have enemies."--Henry Kissinger</li>
2013     </ul>
2014     <hr>
2015     <p><b><u><a name="politfig_colin_powell"></a>Political Figures, Colin Powell</u></b></p>
2016     <ul>
2017     <li>"Being responsible sometimes means pissing people off."--Colin
2018     Powell, from a PowerPoint presentation, <i>A Leadership Primer</i>.</li>
2019     <li>"Being responsible sometimes means pissing people off.&nbsp; Good leadership
2020     involves responsibility to the welfare of the group, which means that some
2021     people will get angry at your actions and decisions.&nbsp; It's inevitable, if you're
2022     honorable.&nbsp; Trying to get everyone to like you is a sign of mediocrity: you'll
2023     avoid the tough decisions, you'll avoid confronting the people who need to be
2024     confronted, and you'll avoid offering differential rewards based on differential
2025     performance because some people might get upset.&nbsp; Ironically, by procrastinating
2026     on the difficult choices, by trying not to get anyone mad, and by treating
2027     everyone equally 'nicely' regardless of their contributions, you'll simply
2028     ensure that the only people you'll wind up angering are the most creative and
2029     productive people in the organization."--Colin Powell, from a PowerPoint
2030     presentation, <i>A Leadership Primer</i></li>
2031     <li>"The day soldiers stop bringing you their problems is the day you have
2032     stopped leading them. They have either lost confidence that you can help them or
2033     concluded that you do not care. Either case is a failure of leadership."--Colin Powell, from a PowerPoint presentation,
2034     <i>A Leadership Primer</i></li>
2035     <li>"The day soldiers stop bringing you their problems is the day you have
2036     stopped leading them.&nbsp; They have either lost confidence that you can help them or
2037     concluded that you do not care.&nbsp; Either case is a failure of leadership.&nbsp;
2038     If this
2039     were a litmus test, the majority of CEOs would fail.&nbsp; One, they build so many
2040     barriers to upward communication that the very idea of someone lower in the
2041     hierarchy looking up to the leader for help is ludicrous.&nbsp; Two, the corporate
2042     culture they foster often defines asking for help as weakness or failure, so
2043     people cover up their gaps, and the organization suffers accordingly.&nbsp; Real
2044     leaders make themselves accessible and available.&nbsp; They show concern for the
2045     efforts and challenges faced by underlings, even as they demand high standards.&nbsp;
2046     Accordingly, they are more likely to create an environment where problem
2047     analysis replaces blame."--Colin Powell, from a PowerPoint presentation, <i>A Leadership
2048     Primer</i></li>
2049     <li>"Don't be buffaloed by experts and elites.&nbsp; Experts often possess more
2050     data than judgment. Elites can become so inbred that they produce hemophiliacs
2051     who bleed to death as soon as they are nicked by the real world."--Colin
2052     Powell, from a PowerPoint presentation, <i>A Leadership Primer</i></li>
2053     <li>"Don't be buffaloed by experts and elites.&nbsp; Experts often possess more
2054     data than judgment.&nbsp; Elites can become so inbred that they produce hemophiliacs
2055     who bleed to death as soon as they are nicked by the real world.&nbsp; Small companies
2056     and start-ups don't have the time for analytically detached experts.&nbsp; They don't
2057     have the money to subsidize lofty elites, either.&nbsp; The president answers the
2058     phone and drives the truck when necessary; everyone on the payroll visibly
2059     produces and contributes to bottom-line results or they're history.&nbsp; But as
2060     companies get bigger, they often forget who 'brought them to the dance':&nbsp; things
2061     like all-hands involvement, egalitarianism, informality, market intimacy,
2062     daring, risk, speed, agility.&nbsp; Policies that emanate from ivory towers often have
2063     an adverse impact on the people out in the field who are fighting the wars or
2064     bringing in the revenues.&nbsp; Real leaders are vigilant, and combative, in the face
2065     of these trends."--Colin Powell, from a PowerPoint presentation, <i>A Leadership
2066     Primer</i></li>
2067     <li>"Don't be afraid to challenge the pros, even in their own backyard."--Colin Powell, from a PowerPoint presentation,
2068     <i>A Leadership Primer</i></li>
2069     <li>"Don't be afraid to challenge the pros, even in their own backyard.&nbsp; Learn from the pros, observe them, seek them out as mentors and partners.&nbsp;
2070     But
2071     remember that even the pros may have leveled out in terms of their learning and
2072     skills.&nbsp; Sometimes even the pros can become complacent and lazy.&nbsp; Leadership does
2073     not emerge from blind obedience to anyone.&nbsp; Xerox's Barry Rand was right on
2074     target when he warned his people that if you have a yes-man working for you, one
2075     of you is redundant.&nbsp; Good leadership encourages everyone's evolution."--Colin
2076     Powell, from a PowerPoint presentation, <i>A Leadership Primer</i></li>
2077     <li>"Never neglect details.&nbsp; When everyone's mind is dulled or distracted
2078     the leader must be doubly vigilant."--Colin Powell, from a PowerPoint
2079     presentation, <i>A Leadership Primer</i></li>
2080     <li>"Never neglect details.&nbsp; When everyone's mind is dulled or distracted
2081     the leader must be doubly vigilant."--Colin Powell, from a PowerPoint
2082     presentation, <i>A Leadership Primer</i></li>
2083     <li>&quot;Strategy equals execution.&nbsp; All the
2084     great ideas and visions in the world are worthless if they can't be implemented
2085     rapidly and efficiently.&nbsp; Good leaders delegate and empower others liberally, but
2086     they pay attention to details, every day.&nbsp; (Think about supreme athletic coaches
2087     like Jimmy Johnson, Pat Riley and Tony La Russa).&nbsp; Bad ones, even those who fancy
2088     themselves as progressive 'visionaries', think they're somehow `above'
2089     operational details.&nbsp; Paradoxically, good leaders understand something else: an
2090     obsessive routine in carrying out the details begets conformity and complacency,
2091     which in turn dulls everyone's mind.&nbsp; That is why even as they pay attention to
2092     details, they continually encourage people to challenge the process.&nbsp; They
2093     implicitly understand the sentiment of CEO leaders like Quad Graphic's Harry
2094     Quadracchi, Oticon's Lars Kolind and the late Bill McGowan of MCI, who all
2095     independently asserted that the job of a leader is not to be the chief
2096     organizer, but the chief dis-organizer.&quot;--Colin Powell, from a PowerPoint
2097     presentation, <i>A Leadership Primer</i></li>
2098     <li>"You don't know what you can get away with until you try."--Colin
2099     Powell, from a PowerPoint presentation, <i>A Leadership Primer</i></li>
2100     <li>"You don't know what you can get away with until you try.&nbsp; You know the
2101     expression, 'it's easier to get forgiveness than permission'.&nbsp; Well, it's true.
2102     Good leaders don't wait for official blessing to try things out. They're
2103     prudent, not reckless.&nbsp; But they also realize a fact of life in most
2104     organizations: if you ask enough people for permission, you'll inevitably come
2105     up against someone who believes his job is to say 'no'. So the moral is, don't
2106     ask.&nbsp; Less effective middle managers endorsed the sentiment, 'If I haven't
2107     explicitly been told <i>yes</i>, I can't do it', whereas the good ones believed,
2108     `If I haven't explicitly been told <i>no</i>, I can.'&nbsp; There's a world of
2109     difference between these two points of view."--Colin Powell, from a PowerPoint
2110     presentation, <i>A Leadership Primer</i></li>
2111     <li>"Keep looking below surface appearances.&nbsp; Don't shrink from doing so
2112     (just) because you might not like what you find."--Colin Powell, from a
2113     PowerPoint presentation, <i>A Leadership Primer</i></li>
2114     <li>"Keep looking below surface appearances.&nbsp; Don't shrink from doing so
2115     (just) because you might not like what you find. 'If it ain't broke, don't fix
2116     it' is the slogan of the complacent, the arrogant or the scared.&nbsp; It's an excuse
2117     for inaction, a call to non-arms.&nbsp; It's a mind-set that assumes (or hopes) that
2118     today's realities will continue tomorrow in a tidy, linear and predictable
2119     fashion.&nbsp; Pure fantasy.&nbsp; In this sort of culture, you won't find people who
2120     pro-actively take steps to solve problems as they emerge.&nbsp; Here's a little tip:
2121     don't invest in these companies."--Colin Powell, from a PowerPoint
2122     presentation, <i>A Leadership Primer</i></li>
2123     <li>"Organization doesn't really accomplish anything.&nbsp; Plans don't
2124     accomplish anything, either.&nbsp; Theories of management don't much matter.&nbsp;
2125     Endeavors
2126     succeed or fail because of the people involved.&nbsp; Only by attracting the best
2127     people will you accomplish great deeds."--Colin Powell, from a PowerPoint
2128     presentation, <i>A Leadership Primer</i></li>
2129     <li>"Organization doesn't really accomplish anything.&nbsp; Plans don't
2130     accomplish anything, either.&nbsp; Theories of management don't much matter.&nbsp;
2131     Endeavors
2132     succeed or fail because of the people involved.&nbsp; Only by attracting the best
2133     people will you accomplish great deeds.&nbsp; In a brain-based economy, your
2134     best assets are people.&nbsp; We've heard this expression so often that it's become
2135     trite.&nbsp; But how many leaders really 'walk the talk' with this stuff?&nbsp; Too often,
2136     people are assumed to be empty chess pieces to be moved around by grand viziers,
2137     which may explain why so many top managers immerse their calendar time in deal
2138     making, restructuring and the latest management fad.&nbsp; How many immerse themselves
2139     in the goal of creating an environment where the best, the brightest, the most
2140     creative are attracted, retained and, most importantly, unleashed?"--Colin
2141     Powell, from a PowerPoint presentation, <i>A Leadership Primer</i></li>
2142     <li>"Organization charts and fancy titles count for next to nothing."--Colin Powell, from a PowerPoint presentation,
2143     <i>A Leadership Primer</i></li>
2144     <li>"Organization charts and fancy titles count for next to nothing.&nbsp; Organization charts are frozen, anachronistic photos in a work place that ought
2145     to be as dynamic as the external environment around you.&nbsp; If people really
2146     followed organization charts, companies would collapse.&nbsp; In well-run
2147     organizations, titles are also pretty meaningless.&nbsp; At best, they advertise some
2148     authority, an official status conferring the ability to give orders and induce
2149     obedience.&nbsp; But titles mean little in terms of real power, which is the capacity
2150     to influence and inspire.&nbsp; Have you ever noticed that people will personally
2151     commit to certain individuals who on paper (or on the organization chart)
2152     possess little authority, but instead possess pizzazz, drive, expertise, and
2153     genuine caring for teammates and products?&nbsp; On the flip side, non-leaders in
2154     management may be formally anointed with all the perks and frills associated
2155     with high positions, but they have little influence on others, apart from their
2156     ability to extract minimal compliance to minimal standards."--Colin Powell,
2157     from a PowerPoint presentation, <i>A Leadership Primer</i></li>
2158     <li>"Never let your ego get so close to your position that when your
2159     position goes, your ego goes with it."--Colin Powell, from a PowerPoint
2160     presentation, <i>A Leadership Primer</i></li>
2161     <li>"Never let your ego get so close to your position that when your
2162     position goes, your ego goes with it.&nbsp; Too often, change is stifled by people who
2163     cling to familiar turfs and job descriptions.&nbsp; One reason that even large
2164     organizations wither is that managers won't challenge old, comfortable ways of
2165     doing things.&nbsp; But real leaders understand that, nowadays, every one of our jobs
2166     is becoming obsolete.&nbsp; The proper response is to obsolete our activities before
2167     someone else does.&nbsp; Effective leaders create a climate where people's worth is
2168     determined by their willingness to learn new skills and grab new
2169     responsibilities, thus perpetually reinventing their jobs.&nbsp; The most important
2170     question in performance evaluation becomes not, 'How well did you perform your
2171     job since the last time we met?' but, 'How much did you change it?'--Colin
2172     Powell, from a PowerPoint presentation, <i>A Leadership Primer</i></li>
2173     <li>"Fit no stereotypes.&nbsp; Don't chase the latest management fads.&nbsp; The
2174     situation dictates which approach best accomplishes the team's mission."--Colin Powell, from a PowerPoint presentation,
2175     <i>A Leadership Primer</i></li>
2176     <li>"Fit no stereotypes.&nbsp; Don't chase the latest management fads.&nbsp; The
2177     situation dictates which approach best accomplishes the team's mission.&nbsp; Flitting
2178     from fad to fad creates team confusion, reduces the leader's credibility, and
2179     drains organizational coffers.&nbsp; Blindly following a particular fad generates
2180     rigidity in thought and action.&nbsp; Sometimes speed to market is more important than
2181     total quality.&nbsp; Sometimes an unapologetic directive is more appropriate than
2182     participatory discussion.&nbsp; Some situations require the leader to hover closely;
2183     others require long, loose leashes.&nbsp; Leaders honor their core values, but they
2184     are flexible in how they execute them.&nbsp; They understand that management
2185     techniques are not magic mantras but simply tools to be reached for at the right
2186     times."--Colin Powell, from a PowerPoint presentation, <i>A Leadership Primer</i></li>
2187     <li>"Perpetual optimism is a force multiplier."--Colin Powell, from a
2188     PowerPoint presentation, <i>A Leadership Primer</i></li>
2189     <li>"Perpetual optimism is a force multiplier.&nbsp; The ripple effect of a
2190     leader's enthusiasm and optimism is awesome.&nbsp; So is the impact of cynicism and
2191     pessimism.&nbsp; Leaders who whine and blame engender those same behaviors among their
2192     colleagues.&nbsp; I am not talking about stoically accepting organizational stupidity
2193     and performance incompetence with a 'what, me worry?' smile.&nbsp; I am talking about
2194     a gung-ho attitude that says 'we can change things here, we can achieve awesome
2195     goals, we can be the best.'&nbsp; Spare me the grim litany of the 'realist', give me
2196     the unrealistic aspirations of the optimist any day."--Colin Powell, from a
2197     PowerPoint presentation, <i>A Leadership Primer</i></li>
2198     <li>"Powell's Rules for Picking People:&nbsp; Look for intelligence and
2199     judgment, and most critically, a capacity to anticipate, to see around corners.&nbsp;
2200     Also look for loyalty, integrity, a high energy drive, a balanced ego, and the
2201     drive to get things done."--Colin Powell, from a PowerPoint presentation, <i>A Leadership
2202     Primer</i></li>
2203     <li>"Powell's Rules for Picking People:&nbsp; Look for intelligence and
2204     judgment, and most critically, a capacity to anticipate, to see around corners.&nbsp;
2205     Also look for loyalty, integrity, a high energy drive, a balanced ego, and the
2206     drive to get things done.&nbsp; How often do our recruitment and hiring processes tap
2207     into these attributes?&nbsp; More often than not, we ignore them in favor of length of
2208     resume, degrees and prior titles.&nbsp; A string of job descriptions a recruit held
2209     yesterday seem to be more important than who one is today, what they can
2210     contribute tomorrow, or how well their values mesh with those of the
2211     organization.&nbsp; You can train a bright, willing novice in the fundamentals of your
2212     business fairly readily, but it's a lot harder to train someone to have
2213     integrity, judgment, energy, balance, and the drive to get things done.&nbsp; Good
2214     leaders stack the deck in their favor right in the recruitment phase."--Colin
2215     Powell, from a PowerPoint presentation, <i>A Leadership Primer</i></li>
2216     <li>"Great leaders are almost always great simplifiers, who can cut
2217     through argument, debate and doubt, to offer a solution everybody can
2218     understand."--Colin Powell, from a PowerPoint presentation, <i>A Leadership
2219     Primer</i></li>
2220     <li>"Great leaders are almost always great simplifiers, who can cut
2221     through argument, debate and doubt, to offer a solution everybody can
2222     understand.&nbsp; Effective leaders understand the KISS principle, Keep It Simple,
2223     Stupid.&nbsp; They articulate vivid, over-arching goals and values, which they use to
2224     drive daily behaviors and choices among competing alternatives.&nbsp; Their visions
2225     and priorities are lean and compelling, not cluttered and buzzword-laden.&nbsp; Their
2226     decisions are crisp and clear, not tentative and ambiguous.&nbsp; They convey an
2227     unwavering firmness and consistency in their actions, aligned with the picture
2228     of the future they paint.&nbsp; The result: clarity of purpose, credibility of
2229     leadership, and integrity in organization."--Colin Powell, from a PowerPoint
2230     presentation, <i>A Leadership Primer</i></li>
2231     <li>"Part I:&nbsp; 'Use the formula P=40 to 70, in which P stands for the
2232     probability of success and the numbers indicate the percentage of information
2233     acquired.'&nbsp; Part II: 'Once the information is in the 40 to 70 range, go with your
2234     gut'."--Colin Powell, from a PowerPoint presentation, <i>A Leadership Primer</i></li>
2235     <li>"Part I:&nbsp; 'Use the formula P=40 to 70, in which P stands for the
2236     probability of success and the numbers indicate the percentage of information
2237     acquired.'&nbsp; Part II: 'Once the information is in the 40 to 70 range, go with your
2238     gut.'&nbsp; Don't take action if you have only enough information to give you less
2239     than a 40 percent chance of being right, but don't wait until you have enough
2240     facts to be 100 percent sure, because by then it is almost always too late.&nbsp;
2241     Today, excessive delays in the name of information-gathering breeds
2242     'analysis
2243     paralysis.'&nbsp; Procrastination in the name of reducing risk actually increases
2244     risk."--Colin Powell, from a PowerPoint presentation, <i>A Leadership Primer</i></li>
2245     <li>"The commander in the field is always right and the rear echelon is
2246     wrong, unless proved otherwise."--Colin Powell, from a PowerPoint
2247     presentation, <i>A Leadership Primer</i></li>
2248     <li>"The commander in the field is always right and the rear echelon is
2249     wrong, unless proved otherwise.&nbsp; Too often, the reverse defines corporate
2250     culture.&nbsp; This is one of the main reasons why leaders like Ken Iverson of Nucor
2251     Steel, Percy Barnevik of Asea Brown Boveri, and Richard Branson of Virgin have
2252     kept their corporate staffs to a bare-bones minimum--how about fewer than 100
2253     central corporate staffers for global $30 billion-plus ABB?&nbsp; Or around 25 and
2254     3 for multi-billion Nucor and Virgin, respectively?&nbsp; Shift the power and the
2255     financial accountability to the folks who are bringing in the beans, not the
2256     ones who are counting or analyzing them."--Colin Powell, from a PowerPoint
2257     presentation, <i>A Leadership Primer</i></li>
2258     <li>"Have fun in your command.&nbsp; Don't always run at a breakneck pace.&nbsp;
2259     Take
2260     leave when you've earned it:&nbsp; Spend time with your families.&nbsp; Corollary: surround
2261     yourself with people who take their work seriously, but not themselves, those
2262     who work hard and play hard."--Colin Powell, from a PowerPoint presentation, <i>A Leadership
2263     Primer</i></li>
2264     <li>"Have fun in your command.&nbsp; Don't always run at a breakneck pace.&nbsp;
2265     Take
2266     leave when you've earned it:&nbsp; Spend time with your families.&nbsp; Corollary: surround
2267     yourself with people who take their work seriously, but not themselves, those
2268     who work hard and play hard.&nbsp; Herb Kelleher of Southwest Air and Anita Roddick of
2269     The Body Shop would agree: seek people who have some balance in their lives, who
2270     are fun to hang out with, who like to laugh (at themselves, too) and who have
2271     some non-job priorities which they approach with the same passion that they do
2272     their work.&nbsp; Spare me the grim workaholic or the pompous pretentious
2273     'professional'; I'll help them find jobs with my competitor."--Colin Powell,
2274     from a PowerPoint presentation, <i>A Leadership Primer</i></li>
2275     <li>"Command is lonely."--Colin Powell, from a PowerPoint presentation, <i>A Leadership
2276     Primer</i> (quote probably from Truman)</li>
2277     <li>"Command is lonely.&nbsp; Harry Truman was right.&nbsp; Whether you're a CEO or
2278     the temporary head of a project team, the buck stops here.&nbsp; You can encourage
2279     participative management and bottom-up employee involvement, but ultimately the
2280     essence of leadership is the willingness to make the tough, unambiguous choices
2281     that will have an impact on the fate of the organization.&nbsp; I've seen too many
2282     non-leaders flinch from this responsibility.&nbsp; Even as you create an informal,
2283     open, collaborative corporate culture, prepare to be lonely."--Colin Powell,
2284     from a PowerPoint presentation, <i>A Leadership Primer</i></li>
2285     <li>"Leadership is the art of accomplishing more than the science of
2286     management says is possible."--Colin Powell, from a PowerPoint presentation, <i>A Leadership
2287     Primer</i></li>
2288     </ul>
2289     <p><b><u>Note:</u></b>&nbsp; Colin Powell's presentation, <i>A Leadership Primer</i>,
2290     is available as a .ZIP'd PowerPoint presentation <a href="../../authindiv/dtashley/bad_management/powellonleadership.zip">here</a>.</p>
2291     <hr>
2292     <p><b><u><a name="politfig_dan_quayle"></a>Political Figures, Dan Quayle</u></b></p>
2293     <ul>
2294     <li>"It isn't pollution that's harming the environment.&nbsp; It's the
2295     impurities in our air and water that are doing it."--Former U.S.
2296     Vice-president Dan Quayle</li>
2297     <li>"I love California.&nbsp; I practically grew up in Phoenix."--Former U.S.
2298     Vice-president Dan Quayle</li>
2299     <li>"The loss of life will be irreplaceable."--Former U.S.
2300     Vice-president Dan Quayle</li>
2301     <li>"I was recently on a tour of Latin America, and the only regret I have
2302     is that I didn't study my Latin harder in school so I could converse with those
2303     people."--Former U.S. Vice-president Dan Quayle</li>
2304     <li>"Hawaii is a unique state.&nbsp; It is a small state.&nbsp; It is a state that is
2305     by itself.&nbsp; It is different from the other 49 states.&nbsp; Well, all states are
2306     different, but it's got a particularly unique situation."--Former U.S.
2307     Vice-president Dan Quayle</li>
2308     </ul>
2309     <hr>
2310     <p><b><u><a name="politfig_ronald_reagan"></a>Political Figures, Ronald Reagan</u></b></p>
2311     <ul>
2312     <li>"I have wondered at times what the Ten Commandments would have looked
2313     like if Moses had run them through the U.S. Congress."--Former U.S. President
2314     Ronald Reagan</li>
2315     </ul>
2316     <hr>
2317     <p><b><u><a name="polit_polit_doubletalk"></a>Politics, Political Doubletalk,
2318     Doubletalk</u></b></p>
2319     <ul>
2320     <li>"We don't necessarily discriminate. We simply exclude certain types of
2321     people."--Colonel Gerald Wellman, ROTC Instructor</li>
2322     <li>"Traditionally, most of Australia's imports come from overseas."--Keppel
2323     Enderbery</li>
2324     <li>"If you let that sort of thing go on, your bread and butter will be
2325     cut right out from under your feet."--Former British foreign minister, Ernest
2326     Bevin</li>
2327     <li>"I have opinions of my own ... strong opinions ... but I don't always
2328     agree with them."--George Bush, former U.S President</li>
2329     <li>"We have to pause and ask ourselves how much clean air do we need?"--Lee
2330     Iacocca, former CEO, Chrysler Corp</li>
2331     <li>"I was provided with additional input that was radically different
2332     from the truth.&nbsp; I assisted in furthering that version."--Colonel Oliver North,
2333     from his Iran-Contra testimony</li>
2334     <li>"I haven't committed a crime.&nbsp; What I did was fail to comply with the
2335     law."--David Dinkins, New York City Mayor, (answering accusations that he
2336     failed to pay his taxes)</li>
2337     <li>"Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates
2338     in the country."--Mayor Marion Barry, Washington, DC</li>
2339     <li>"China is a big country, inhabited by many Chinese."--Former French
2340     President Charles De Gaulle</li>
2341     <li>"That lowdown scoundrel deserves to be kicked to death by a jackass,
2342     and I'm just the one to do it."--A congressional candidate in Texas</li>
2343     </ul>
2344     <hr>
2345     <p><b><u><a name="religion"></a>Religion</u></b></p>
2346     <ul>
2347     <li>"Absolute faith corrupts as absolutely as absolute power."--Eric Hoffer (1902 - 1983)
2348     </li>
2349     <li>"I contend we are both atheists, I just believe in one fewer god than you do.&nbsp;
2350     When you understand why you dismiss all the other possible gods, you will understand why I dismiss
2351     yours."-- Stephen F. Roberts
2352     </li>
2353     <li>"It is the final proof of God's omnipotence that he need not exist in order to save
2354     us."--Peter De Vries, novelist (1910-1993)
2355     </li>
2356     <li>"There are only two kinds of men: the righteous who believe themselves sinners;
2357     and the sinners who believe themselves righteous.--Blaise Pascal, philosopher and mathematician (1623-1662)
2358     </li>
2359     <li>"Moral certainty is always a sign of cultural inferiority.&nbsp; The more uncivilized the man,
2360     the surer he is that he knows precisely what is right and what is wrong.&nbsp;
2361     All human progress, even in morals, has been the work of men who have doubted the current moral values,
2362     not of men who have whooped them up and tried to enforce them.&nbsp; The truly civilized man is
2363     always skeptical and tolerant, in this field as in all others.&nbsp; His culture is based on
2364     'I am not too sure.'"-- H.L.Mencken, author (1880 - 1956)
2365     </li>
2366     <li>"Conceit is God's gift to little men."--Bruce Barton
2367     </li>
2368     <li>"To surrender to ignorance and call it God has always been premature, and it
2369     remains premature today."-- Isaac Asimov, author (1920 - 1992)
2370     </li>
2371     <li>"With or without religion, you would have good people doing good things and evil people doing evil
2372     things.&nbsp; But for good people to do evil things, that takes religion."-- Steven Weinberg (1933 - ),
2373     quoted in The New York Times, April 20, 1999
2374     </li>
2375     <li>"A myth is a religion in which no one any longer believes."--James Feibleman
2376     </li>
2377     <li>"A superstition is a premature explanation that overstays its time."--George Iles
2378     </li>
2379     <li>"The divinity of Jesus is made a convenient cover for absurdity.&nbsp; Nowhere in the Gospels do we
2380     find a precept for Creeds, Confessions, Oaths, Doctrines, and whole carloads of other
2381     foolish trumpery that we find in Christianity."--John Adams (1735 -1826)
2382     </li>
2383     <li>"I do not find in orthodox Christianity one redeeming feature."--Thomas Jefferson (1743 -1826)
2384     </li>
2385     <li>"I have recently been examining all the known superstitions of the world, and do not find in
2386     our particular superstition (Christianity) one redeeming feature.&nbsp; They are all alike
2387     founded on fables and mythology."--Thomas Jefferson (1743 -1826)
2388     </li>
2389     <li>"The day will come when the mystical generation of Jesus, by the Supreme Being as his Father,
2390     in the womb of a virgin will be classified with the fable of the generation
2391     of Minerva in the brain of Jupiter.&nbsp; But we may hope that the dawn of reason
2392     and freedom of thought in these United States will do away with this
2393     artificial scaffolding and restore to us the primitive and genuine doctrines
2394     of this most venerated Reformer of human errors."--Thomas Jefferson (1743 -1826)
2395     </li>
2396     <li>"The Bible is not my book, and Christianity is not my religion.&nbsp; I could never give
2397     assent to the long, complicated statements of Christian
2398     dogma."--Abraham Lincoln (1809 -1865)
2399     </li>
2400     <li>"As to Jesus of Nazareth ... I think the system of Morals and his Religion,
2401     as he left them to us, the best the World ever saw or is likely to see; but I apprehend it
2402     has received various corrupting Changes, and I have, with most of the present
2403     Dissenters in England, some doubts as to his divinity."--Benjamin Franklin (1706 -1790)
2404     </li>
2405     <li>"The study of theology, as it stands in the Christian churches, is the study of nothing;
2406     it is founded on nothing; it rests on no principles; it proceeds by no authority; it has no data;
2407     it can demonstrate nothing; and it admits of no conclusion."--Thomas Paine (1737 -1809)
2408     </li>
2409     <li>"I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason,
2410     and intellect has intended us to forgo their use."--Galileo Galilei, physicist and astronomer (1564-1642)
2411     </li>
2412     <li>"There was a time when religion ruled the world.&nbsp; It is known as the Dark
2413     Ages."--Ruth Hermence Green
2414     </li>
2415     <li>"We are taught to believe that there's an invisible man who lives in the sky,
2416     who has a list of 10 things he doesn't want you to do,
2417     who watches you every minute of every day, and if you do something he doesn't like,
2418     he's going to send you to a burning lake of fire ... forever.&nbsp; But He loves you.--George Carlin
2419     </li>
2420     <li>"To teach superstitions as truth is a most terrible thing."--Hypatia
2421     </li>
2422     <li>"If you want to know what God thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it
2423     to."--Dorothy Parker - poet, short-story writer, theater critic and screenwriter (1893-1967)
2424     </li>
2425     <li>"I read the whole of the Bible, and apply common sense to it.&nbsp; Sorry to be so boring.&nbsp;
2426     Something which is said several thousand times (e.g. God is worried about the poor)
2427     I regard as more important than something which is said once (e.g. God thinks being gay
2428     incurs ritual pollution) or never (e.g. God doesn't approve of abortion).&nbsp; If
2429     I understand them correctly, the fundamentalists take the opposite approach:
2430     abortion is the most important issue, homosexuality the second most important,
2431     and feeding the poor doesn't matter at all."--Andrew Rilstone (Andrew@aslan.demon.co.uk)
2432     </li>
2433     <li>"Had I been present at the creation, I would have given some useful hints for the better
2434     ordering of the universe."--Alphonso the Wise (1221-1284)
2435     </li>
2436     <li>"What religion are you afflicted with?"--Unknown
2437     </li>
2438     <li>"Morality is the best of all devices for leading mankind by the nose."--Frederick Nietzsche, philosopher (1844-1900)
2439     </li>
2440     <li>"Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully as when they do it from religious
2441     conviction."--Blaise Pascal, philosopher, mathematician (1623-1662)
2442     </li>
2443     <li>"I do not pretend to be able to prove that there is no God.&nbsp; I equally cannot
2444     prove that Satan is a fiction.&nbsp; The Christian God may exist; so
2445     may the Gods of Olympus, or of ancient Egypt, or of Babylon.&nbsp; But no one of these
2446     hypotheses is more probable than any other: they lie outside the
2447     region of probable knowledge, and therefore there is no reason to consider any of
2448     them."--Lord Bertrand Russell (1872-1970)
2449     </li>
2450     <li>"The devil can cite Scripture for his purpose."--William Shakespeare, poet and dramatist (1564-1616)
2451     </li>
2452     <li>"Religion is an insult to human dignity.&nbsp; With or without it, you'd have good people doing
2453     good things and evil people doing bad things, but for good people to do bad things, it takes
2454     religion."--Steven Weinberg, physicist, Nobel Laureate (1933-)
2455     </li>
2456     <li>"Man is a marvelous curiosity ... he thinks he is the Creator's pet; he even believes the Creator loves him;
2457     has a passion for him; sits up nights to admire him; yes and watch over him and keep him out of
2458     trouble.&nbsp; He prays to him and thinks He listens.&nbsp; Isn't it a quaint idea."--Mark Twain,
2459     author and humorist (1835-1910)
2460     </li>
2461     <li>"One of the proofs of the immortality of the soul is that myriads have believed in
2462     it.&nbsp; They have also believed the world was flat."--Mark Twain, author and humorist (1835-1910)
2463     </li>
2464     <li>"I cannot see how a man of any large degree of humorous perception can ever be religious - unless
2465     he purposely shut the eyes of his mind and keep them shut by
2466     force."--Mark Twain, author and humorist (1835-1910)
2467     </li>
2468     <li>"Irreverence is another person's disrespect to your god; there isn't any word that tells what your
2469     disrespect to his god is."--Mark Twain, author and humorist (1835-1910)
2470     </li>
2471     <li>"I believe in God, only I spell it Nature."--Frank Lloyd Wright, architect (1867-1959)
2472     </li>
2473     <li>"We are all atheists about most of the gods that humanity has ever believed in.&nbsp; Some
2474     of us just go one god further."--Richard Dawkins, biologist, author, philosopher (1941-)
2475     </li>
2476     <li>"My theology, briefly, is that the universe was dictated but not signed."-Christopher Morley, writer (1890-1957)
2477     </li>
2478     <li>"So many gods, so many creeds, So many paths that wind and wind, While just the art of being kind is
2479     all the sad world needs."--Ella Wheeler Wilcox, poet (1850-1919)
2480     </li>
2481     <li>"No sooner had Jesus knocked over the dragon of superstition that Paul boldly set it on it's legs
2482     again in the name of Jesus."--George Bernard Shaw, writer, Nobel laureate (1856-1950)
2483     </li>
2484     <li>"If God created us in his own image, we have more than reciprocated."--Voltaire, philosopher (1694-1778)
2485     </li>
2486     <li>"If the gods listened to the prayers of men, all humankind would quickly perish since they constantly
2487     pray for many evils to befall one another."--Epicurus, philosopher (c. 341-270 BCE)
2488     </li>
2489     <li>"Nothing is more dreaded than the national government meddling with religion."--John Adams (1797-1801)
2490     </li>
2491     <li>"Faith is the great cop-out, the great excuse to evade the need to think and evaluate evidence.&nbsp; Faith
2492     is belief in spite of, even perhaps because of, the lack of evidence."--Richard Dawkins, biologist, author, philosopher (1941-)
2493     </li>
2494     <li>"Puritanism: The haunting fear that someone, somewhere, may be happy."--H. L. Mencken, author (1880 - 1956)
2495     </li>
2496     <li>"Faith is a cop-out.&nbsp; If the only way you can accept an assertion is by faith,
2497     then you are conceding that it can't be taken on its own merits."--Dan Barker, "Losing Faith in Faith", 1992
2498     </li>
2499     <li>"If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?"--Unattributed
2500     </li>
2501     </ul>
2502     <hr>
2503     <p><b><u><a name="sci_mat_marie_curie"></a>Scientists And Mathematicians, Marie
2504     Curie</u></b></p>
2505     <ul>
2506     <li>&quot;Nothing in life is to be feared. It is only to be
2507     understood.&quot;--Marie Curie</li>
2508     </ul>
2509     <hr>
2510     <p><b><u><a name="sci_mat_edsger_dijkstra"></a>Scientists And Mathematicians, Edsger
2511     Dijkstra</u></b></p>
2512     <ul>
2513     <li>&quot;The question of whether computers can think is just
2514     like the question of whether submarines can swim.&quot;--Edsger W. Dijkstra</li>
2515     </ul>
2516     <hr>
2517     <p><b><u><a name="sci_mat_albert_einstein"></a>Scientists And Mathematicians, Albert
2518     Einstein</u></b></p>
2519     <ul>
2520     <li>&quot;We are all very ignorant, but not all ignorant of the same
2521     things.&quot;--Albert Einstein</li>
2522     <li>"Thus I came -- despite the fact that I was the son of entirely irreligious (Jewish) parents --
2523     to a deep religiosity, which, however, found an abrupt ending at the age of 12.&nbsp; Through the
2524     reading of popular scientific books I soon reached the conviction that much in the stories
2525     of the bible could not be true.&nbsp; The consequence was a positively fanatic
2526     [orgy of] freethinking coupled with the impression that youth is intentionally
2527     being deceived by the state through lies; it was a crushing impression.&nbsp; Suspicion against every
2528     kind of authority grew out of this experience, a skeptical attitude towards the
2529     convictions which were alive in any specific social environment .... I cannot conceive
2530     of a personal God who would directly influence the actions of individuals ..."-- Albert Einstein,
2531     physicist (1879-1955) - August, 1927 -- Einstein Archive 48-380
2532     </li>
2533     <li>"Science without religion is lame.&nbsp; Religion without science is blind."-Albert Einstein, physicist (1879-1955)
2534     at Science, Philosophy and Religion: a Symposium, 1941
2535     </li>
2536    
2537     <li>
2538    
2539     &quot;
2540    
2541     Not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that counts can be counted.&quot;-- Albert Einstein, physicist (1879 - 1955)
2542     </li>
2543    
2544     <li>
2545    
2546     &quot;There are only two truly infinite things, the universe and stupidity.&nbsp;
2547     And I am unsure about the universe.&quot;--Albert Einstein, physicist (1879-1955)
2548     </li>
2549    
2550     <li>
2551    
2552     &quot;What terrifies us is not the explosive force of the atomic bomb, but the power of the wickedness of the human heart.&quot;--Albert Einstein, physicist (1879-1955)
2553     </li>
2554    
2555     <li>
2556    
2557     &quot;It is a miracle that curiosity survives formal education.&quot;--Albert Einstein, physicist (1879-1955)
2558     </li>
2559    
2560     <li>
2561    
2562     &quot;The more I study physics, the more I am drawn to metaphysics.&quot;--Albert Einstein,
2563     physicist (1879-1955)
2564     </li>
2565    
2566     <li>
2567    
2568     &quot;Definition of Insanity:&nbsp; Endlessly repeating the same process, hoping for a different result."--Albert Einstein
2569     </li>
2570    
2571     <li>
2572    
2573     &quot;Make things as simple as possible, but not simpler.&quot;--Albert Einstein, physicist (1879-1955)
2574     </li>
2575    
2576     <li>
2577    
2578     &quot;Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds.&quot;--Albert Einstein, physicist (1879-1955)
2579     </li>
2580    
2581     </ul>
2582     <hr>
2583     <p><b><u><a name="sci_mat_gh_hardy"></a>Scientists And Mathematicians, G.H.
2584     Hardy</u></b></p>
2585     <ul>
2586     <li>&quot;It is never worth a first class man's time to express a majority
2587     opinion.&nbsp; By definition, there are plenty of others to do that.&quot;--G.H. Hardy,
2588     <i>A Mathematician's Apology</i></li>
2589     <li>&quot;For any serious purpose, intelligence is a very minor gift.&quot;--G.H. Hardy,
2590     <i>A Mathematician's Apology</i></li>
2591     <li>&quot;Young men ought to be conceited:&nbsp; but they oughtn't to be
2592     imbecile."--G.H. Hardy (according to C.P. Snow in the foreword of <i>A
2593     Mathematician's Apology</i>, said after someone had tried to
2594     convince Hardy that <i>Finnegans Wake</i> was the final literary masterpiece.)</li>
2595     <li>&quot;Sometimes one has to say difficult things, but one ought to say them
2596     as simply as one knows how.&quot;--G.H. Hardy, <i>A Mathematician's Apology</i></li>
2597     <li>&quot;Statesmen despise publicists, painters despise art-critics, and
2598     physiologists, physicists, or mathematicians have usually similar feelings;
2599     there is no scorn more profound, or on the whole more justifiable, than that of
2600     the men who make for the men who explain.&nbsp; Exposition, criticism, appreciation,
2601     is work for second-rate minds.&quot;--G.H. Hardy, <i>A Mathematician's Apology</i></li>
2602     <li>&quot;... There is no one so stupid as to use this sort of language
2603     about mathematics.&nbsp; The mass of mathematical truth is obvious and imposing; its
2604     practical applications, the bridges and the steam engines and dynamos, obtrude
2605     themselves on the dullest imagination.&quot;--G.H. Hardy, <i>A Mathematician's
2606     Apology</i></li>
2607     <li>&quot;... Some egotism of this sort is inevitable, and I do not feel
2608     that it really needs justification.&nbsp; Good work is not done by 'humble' men.&nbsp;
2609     It is
2610     one of the first duties of a professor, for example, in any subject, to
2611     exaggerate a little both the importance of his subject and his own importance in
2612     it.&nbsp; A man who is always asking 'Is what I do worth while?' and 'Am I the right
2613     person to do it?' will always be ineffective himself and a discouragement to
2614     others.&quot;--G.H. Hardy, <i>A Mathematician's Apology</i></li>
2615     <li>&quot;... I am not suggesting that this is a defence which can be made
2616     by most people, since most people can do nothing at all well.&quot;--G.H. Hardy,
2617     <i>A Mathematician's Apology</i></li>
2618     <li>&quot;... If a man has any genuine talent, he should be ready to make
2619     almost any sacrifice in order to cultivate it to the full.&quot;--G.H. Hardy, <i>A
2620     Mathematician's Apology</i></li>
2621     <li>&quot;No mathematician should ever allow himself to forget that
2622     mathematics, more than any other art or science, is a young man's game.&quot;--G.H. Hardy,
2623     <i>A Mathematician's Apology</i></li>
2624     <li>&quot;I do not know an instance of a major mathematical advance initiated
2625     by a man past fifty.&nbsp; If a man of mature age loses interest in and abandons
2626     mathematics, the loss is not likely to be very serious either for mathematics or
2627     for himself.&quot;--G.H. Hardy, <i>A Mathematician's Apology</i></li>
2628     <li>&quot;It is quite true that most people can do nothing well.&nbsp; If so, it
2629     matters very little what career they choose, and there is really nothing more to
2630     say about it.&nbsp; It is a conclusive reply, but hardly one likely to be made by a
2631     man with any pride; and I may assume that none of us would be content with
2632     it.&quot;--G.H. Hardy, <i>A Mathematician's Apology</i></li>
2633     <li>&quot;(Speaking with respect to mathematical achievement) ... What we
2634     do may be small, but it has a certain character of permanence; and to have
2635     produced anything of the slightest permanent interest, whether it be a copy of
2636     verses or a geometrical theorem, is to have done something utterly beyond the
2637     powers of the vast majority of men.&quot;--G.H. Hardy, <i>A Mathematician's
2638     Apology</i></li>
2639     <li>&quot;(Speaking with respect to mathematical achievement) ... In these
2640     days of conflict between ancient and modern studies, there must surely be
2641     something to be said for a study which did not begin with Pythagoras, and
2642     will not end with Einstein, but is the oldest and the youngest of
2643     all.&quot;--G.H. Hardy, <i>A Mathematician's Apology</i></li>
2644     <li>&quot;A man's first duty, a young man's at any rate, is to be
2645     ambitious.&quot;--G.H. Hardy, <i>A Mathematician's Apology</i></li>
2646     <li>&quot;... We must guard against a fallacy common apologists of
2647     science, the fallacy of supposing that the men whose work benefits humanity are
2648     thinking much of that while they do it ... There are many highly
2649     respectable motives that may lead men to prosecute research, but there are three
2650     which are much more important than the rest.&nbsp; The first (without which the rest
2651     must come to nothing) is intellectual curiosity, desire to know the truth.&nbsp;
2652     Then,
2653     professional pride, anxiety to be satisfied with one's performance, the shame
2654     that overcomes any self-respecting craftsman when his work is unworthy of his
2655     talent.&nbsp; Finally, ambition, desire for reputation, and the position, even the
2656     power or the money, which it brings.&quot;--G.H. Hardy, <i>A Mathematician's
2657     Apology</i></li>
2658     <li>&quot;If intellectual curiosity, professional pride, and ambition are the
2659     dominant incentives to research, then assuredly no one has a fairer chance of
2660     gratifying them then a mathematician.&nbsp; His subject is the most curious of
2661     all--there is none in which truth plays such odd pranks.&nbsp; It has the most
2662     elaborate and the most fascinating technique, and gives unrivalled openings for
2663     the display of sheer professional skill.&nbsp; Finally, as history proves abundantly,
2664     mathematical achievement, whatever its intrinsic worth, is the most enduring of
2665     all.&quot;--G.H. Hardy, <i>A Mathematician's Apology</i></li>
2666     <li>&quot;<i>Immortality</i> may be a silly word, but probably a mathematician
2667     has the best chance of whatever it may mean.&quot;--G.H. Hardy, <i>A
2668     Mathematician's Apology</i></li>
2669     <li>&quot;... Farey is immortal because he failed to understand a theorem
2670     which Haros had proved perfectly fourteen years before ... But on the whole
2671     the history of science is fair, and this is particularly true in mathematics ...
2672     and the men who are remembered are almost always the men who merit
2673     it.&quot;--G.H. Hardy, <i>A Mathematician's Apology</i>, pp. 81-82, citing instances
2674     where mathematical history was inaccurate</li>
2675     <li>&quot;It is sometimes suggested, by lawyers or politicians or business
2676     men, that an academic career is one sought mainly by cautious and
2677     unambitious persons who care primarily for comfort and security.&quot;--G.H. Hardy,
2678     <i>A Mathematician's Apology</i>, p.82</li>
2679     <li>&quot;A mathematician, like a painter or a poet, is a maker of patterns.&nbsp;
2680     If
2681     his patterns are more permanent than theirs, it is because they are made with <i>ideas</i>.&quot;--G.H. Hardy,
2682     <i>A Mathematician's Apology</i>, p.84</li>
2683     <li>&quot;... Beauty is the first test: there is no permanent place in the
2684     world for ugly mathematics.&quot;--G.H. Hardy, <i>A Mathematician's Apology</i>, p.85</li>
2685     <li>&quot;It may be very hard to <i>define</i> mathematical beauty, but that is
2686     just as true of beauty of any kind--we may not know quite what we mean by a
2687     beautiful poem, but that does not prevent us from recognizing one when we read
2688     it.&quot;--G.H. Hardy, <i>A Mathematician's Apology</i></li>
2689     <li>&quot;There are, to be sure, individuals for whom mathematics exercises a
2690     coldly impersonal attraction ...&nbsp; The aesthetic appeal of mathematics may be
2691     very real for a chosen few.&quot;--G.H. Hardy, <i>A Mathematician's Apology</i>, quoting
2692     Hogben, p. 86</li>
2693     <li>&quot;The seriousness of a theorem, of course, does not <i>lie in</i> its
2694     consequences, which are merely the <i>evidence</i> for its seriousness.&nbsp; Shakespeare had an enormous influence on the development of the English
2695     language, Otway next to none, but that is not why Shakespeare was the better
2696     poet.&nbsp; He was the better poet because he wrote much better poetry.&quot;--G.H. Hardy,
2697     <i>A Mathematician's Apology</i>, p.90</li>
2698     <li>&quot;The number of primes less than 1,000,000,000 is 50,847,478:&nbsp; that is
2699     enough for an engineer, and he can be perfectly happy without the rest.&quot;--G.H. Hardy,
2700     <i>A Mathematician's Apology</i>, p.102</li>
2701     <li>&quot;Some measure of generality must be present in any high-class theorem,
2702     but <i>too much</i> tends inevitably towards insipidity.&nbsp; 'Everything is what it
2703     is, and not another thing', and the differences between things are quite as
2704     interesting as their resemblances.&nbsp; We do not choose our friends because they
2705     embody all the pleasant qualities of humanity, but because they are the people
2706     that they are.&quot;--G.H. Hardy, <i>A Mathematician's Apology</i>, p. 109</li>
2707     <li>&quot;It seems that mathematical ideas are arranged somehow in strata, the
2708     ideas in each stratum being linked by a complex of relations both among
2709     themselves and with those above and below.&nbsp; The lower the stratum, the deeper
2710     (and in general the more difficult) the idea.&nbsp; Thus the idea of an
2711     'irrational'
2712     is deeper than that of an integer ...&nbsp; Let us concentrate our attention on
2713     the relations between the integers, or some other group of objects lying in some
2714     particular stratum.&nbsp; Then it may happen that one of these relations can be
2715     comprehended completely, that we can recognize and prove, for example, some
2716     property of the integers, without any knowledge of the contents of lower strata
2717     ...&nbsp; But there are also many theorems about integers which we cannot
2718     appreciate properly, and still less prove, without digging deeper and
2719     considering what happens below.&quot;--G.H. Hardy, <i>A Mathematician's Apology</i>, pp. 110-111</li>
2720     <li>&quot;We do not want many 'variations' in the proof of a mathematical
2721     theorem:&nbsp; 'enumeration of cases', indeed, is one of the duller forms of
2722     mathematical argument.&nbsp; A mathematical proof should resemble a simple and
2723     clear-cut constellation, not a scattered cluster in the Milky Way.&quot;--G.H. Hardy,
2724     <i>A Mathematician's Apology</i>, p. 113</li>
2725     <li>&quot;It is sometimes suggested that pure mathematicians glory in the
2726     uselessness of their work, and make it a boast that it has no practical
2727     applications.&nbsp; The imputation is usually based on an incautious saying attributed
2728     to Gauss, to the effect that, if mathematics is the queen of the sciences, the
2729     the theory of numbers is, because of its supreme uselessness, the queen of
2730     mathematics--I have never been able to find an exact quotation.&nbsp; I am sure that
2731     Gauss's saying (if indeed it be his) has been rather crudely misinterpreted.&nbsp;
2732     If
2733     the theory of numbers could be employed for any practical and obviously
2734     honourable purpose, if it could be turned directly to the furtherance of human
2735     happiness of the relief of human suffering, as physiology and even chemistry
2736     can, the surely neither Gauss nor any other mathematician would have been so
2737     foolish as to decry or regret such applications.&nbsp; But science works for evil as
2738     well as for good (and particularly, of course in time of war); and both Gauss
2739     and lesser mathematicians may be justified in rejoicing that there is one
2740     science at any rate, and that their own, whose very remoteness from ordinary
2741     human activities should keep it gentle and clean.&quot;G.H. Hardy, <i>A
2742     Mathematician's Apology</i>, pp. 120-121</li>
2743     <li>&quot;I began by saying that there is probably less difference between the
2744     positions of a mathematician and of a physicist than is generally supposed, and
2745     that the most important seems to me to be this, that the mathematician is in
2746     much more direct contact with reality ... mathematical objects are so much
2747     more what they seem.&nbsp; A chair or a star is not in the least like what it seems to
2748     be; the more we think of it, the fuzzier its outlines become in the haze of
2749     sensation which surround it; but '2' or '317' has nothing to do with sensation,
2750     and its properties stand out the more clearly the more closely we scrutinize
2751     it.&quot;--G.H. Hardy, <i>A Mathematician's Apology</i>, pp. 128-130</li>
2752     <li>&quot;It is the dull and elementary parts of applied mathematics, as it is
2753     the dull and elementary parts of pure mathematics, that work for good or ill.&nbsp;
2754     Time may change all this.&nbsp; No one foresaw the applications of matrices and groups
2755     and other purely mathematical theories to modern physics, and it may be that
2756     some of the 'highbrow' applied mathematics will become 'useful' in as unexpected
2757     a way;&nbsp; but the evidence so far points to the conclusion that, in one subject as
2758     in the other, it is what is commonplace and dull that counts for practical
2759     life.&quot;--G.H. Hardy, <i>A Mathematician's Apology</i>, p.132. (Written
2760     around 1940, this was an uncanny precursor to nuclear weaponry.)</li>
2761     <li>&quot;There is one comforting conclusion which is easy for a real
2762     mathematician.&nbsp; Real mathematics has no effects on war.&nbsp; No one has yet discovered
2763     any warlike purpose to be served by the theory of numbers or relativity, and it
2764     seems unlikely that anyone will do so for many years.&nbsp; It is true that there are
2765     branches of applied mathematics, such as ballistics and aerodynamics, which have
2766     been developed deliberately for war and demand a quite elaborate technique: it
2767     is perhaps hard to call them 'trivial', but none of them has any claim to rank
2768     as 'real'.&nbsp; They are indeed repulsively ugly and intolerably dull; even
2769     Littlewood could not make ballistics respectable, and if he could not who
2770     can?&quot;--G.H. Hardy, <i>A Mathematician's Apology</i>, p. 140. (Written
2771     around 1940, this was an uncanny precursor to nuclear weaponry.&nbsp; Also, Snow
2772     writes in the foreword, pp. 39-40, &quot;Hardy's close friends were away at the
2773     war.&nbsp; Littlewood was doing ballistics as a Second Lieutenant in the Royal
2774     Artillery.&nbsp; Owing to his cheerful indifference he had the distinction of
2775     remaining a Second Lieutenant through the four years of the war.&quot;)</li>
2776     <li>&quot;... there are two sharply contrasted views about modern
2777     scientific war.&nbsp; The first and the most obvious is that the effect of science on
2778     war is merely to magnify its horror, both by increasing the sufferings of the
2779     minority who have to fight and by extending them to other classes.&nbsp; This is the
2780     most natural and the orthodox view.&nbsp; But there is a very different view which
2781     seems also quite tenable, and which has been stated with great force by Haldane
2782     in <i>Callinicus</i>.&nbsp; It can be maintained that modern warfare is <i>less</i>
2783     horrible than the warfare of pre-scientific times;&nbsp; the bombs are probably more
2784     merciful than bayonets;&nbsp; that lachrymatory gas and mustard gas are perhaps the
2785     most humane weapons yet devised by military science;&nbsp; and that the orthodox view
2786     rests solely on loose-thinking sentimentalism.&nbsp; It may also be urged (although
2787     this was not one of Haldane's theses) that the equalization of risks which
2788     science was expected to bring would be in the long run salutary;&nbsp; that a
2789     civilian's wife is not worth more than a soldier's, nor a woman's more than a
2790     man's;&nbsp; that anything is better than the concentration of savagery on one
2791     particular class;&nbsp; and that, in short, the sooner the war comes 'all out' the
2792     better.&quot;--G.H. Hardy, <i>A Mathematician's Apology</i>, p. 142</li>
2793     <li>&quot;When the world is mad, a mathematician may find in mathematics an
2794     incomparable anodyne.&nbsp; For mathematics is, of all the arts and sciences, the most
2795     austere and the most remote, and a mathematician should be for all men the one
2796     who can most easily take refuge where, as Bertrand Russell says, 'one at least
2797     of our nobler impulese can best escape from the dreary exile of the actual
2798     world'.&nbsp; It is a pity that is should be necessary to make one very serious
2799     reservation--he must not be too old.&nbsp; Mathematics is not a contemplative but a
2800     creative subject; no one can draw much consolation from it when he has lost the
2801     power or the desire to create; and that is apt to happen to a mathematician
2802     rather soon.&quot;--G.H. Hardy, <i>A Mathematician's Apology</i>, p. 143</li>
2803     <li>&quot;I cannot remember ever having wanted to be anything but a
2804     mathematician.&nbsp; I suppose that it was always clear that my specific abilities lay
2805     that way, and it never occurred to me to question the verdict of my elders.&nbsp;
2806     I do
2807     not remember having felt, as a boy, any <i>passion</i> for mathematics, and such
2808     notions as I may have had of the career of a mathematician were far from noble.&nbsp;
2809     I thought of mathematics in terms of examinations and scholarships:&nbsp; I wanted to
2810     beat other boys, and this seemed to be the way in which I could do so most
2811     decisively.&quot;--G.H. Hardy, <i>A Mathematician's Apology</i>, p. 144</li>
2812     <li>&quot;I had of course found at school, as every future mathematician does,
2813     that I could often do things much better than my teachers; and even at Cambridge
2814     I found, though naturally much less frequently, that I could sometimes do things
2815     better than the College lecturers.&quot;--G.H. Hardy, <i>A Mathematician's
2816     Apology</i>, p. 146-147</li>
2817     <li>&quot;It is plain now that my life, for what it is worth, is finished, and
2818     that nothing I can do can perceptibly increase or diminish its value.&nbsp; It is very
2819     difficult to be dispassionate, but I count it as a 'success';&nbsp; I have had more
2820     reward and not less than was due to a man of my particular grade of ability.&nbsp;
2821     I have held a series of comfortable and 'dignified' positions.&nbsp; I have had very
2822     little trouble with the duller routine of universities.&nbsp; I hate 'teaching', and
2823     have had to do very little, such teaching as I have done having been almost
2824     entirely supervision of research;&nbsp; I love lecturing, and have lectured a great
2825     deal to extremely able classes;&nbsp; and I have always had plenty of leisure for the
2826     researches which have been the one great permanent happiness of my life.&nbsp; I have
2827     found it easy to work with others, and have collaborated on a large scale with
2828     two exceptional mathematicians; and this has enabled me to add to mathematics a
2829     good deal more than I could reasonably have expected.&nbsp; I have had my
2830     disappointments, like any other mathematician, but none of them has been too
2831     serious or has made me particularly unhappy.&nbsp; If I had been offered a life
2832     neither better nor worse when I was twenty, I would have accepted without
2833     hesitation.&quot;--G.H. Hardy, <i>A Mathematician's Apology</i>, p. 149</li>
2834     <li>&quot;My choice was right, then, if what I wanted was a reasonably
2835     comfortable and happy life.&nbsp; But solicitors and stockbrokers and bookmakers often
2836     lead comfortable and happy lives, and it is very difficult to see how the world
2837     is richer for their existence.&nbsp; Is there any sense in which I can claim that my
2838     life has been less futile than theirs?&nbsp; It seems to me again that there is only
2839     one possible answer: yes, perhaps, but, if so, for one reason only.&nbsp; I have never
2840     done anything 'useful'.&nbsp; No discovery of mine has made, or is likely to make,
2841     directly or indirectly, for good or ill, the least difference to the amenity of
2842     the world.&nbsp; I have helped to train other mathematicians, but mathematicians of
2843     the same kind as myself, and their work has been, so far at any rate as I have
2844     helped them to it, as useless as my own.&nbsp; Judged by all practical standards, the
2845     value of my mathematical life is nil; and outside mathematics it is trivial
2846     anyhow.&nbsp; I have just one chance of escaping a verdict of complete triviality,
2847     that I may be judged to have created something worth creating.&nbsp; And that I have
2848     created something is undeniable: the question is about its value.&nbsp; The case for
2849     my life, then, or for that of any one else who has been a mathematician in the
2850     same sense in which I have been one, is this: that I have added something to
2851     knowledge, and helped others to add more; and that these somethings have a value
2852     which differs in degree only, and not in kind, from that of the creations of the
2853     great mathematicians, or of any of the other artists, great or small, who have
2854     left some kind of memorial behind them.&quot;--G.H. Hardy, <i>A Mathematician's
2855     Apology</i>, pp. 150-151</li>
2856     </ul>
2857     <p><b><u>Note:</u></b>&nbsp; As of May 11, 2003, Hardy's book, <i>A
2858     Mathematician's Apology</i>, is <a href="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/0521427061/qid=1052633115/sr=1-1/ref=sr_1_1/102-8561334-0224108?v=glance&amp;s=books">available
2859     new from Amazon</a> for $11.90.&nbsp; Also as of May 11, 2003, there are <a href="http://half.ebay.com/cat/buy/prod.cgi?cpid=2943234&amp;meta_id=1">5
2860     copies available at Half.com</a> for as low as $6.12.&nbsp;&nbsp;</p>
2861     <hr>
2862     <p><b><u><a name="sci_mat_james_s_harris"></a>Scientists And Mathematicians, James S.
2863     Harris</u></b></p>
2864     <ul>
2865     <li>&quot;My peers are Gauss and Euler, not ANY of you.&quot;--James S. Harris, as
2866     the <i> SUBJ</i> field in a <i>sci.math</i> newsgroup post dated July 4, 2002</li>
2867     </ul>
2868     <hr>
2869     <p><b><u><a name="sci_mat_bertrand_russell"></a>Scientists And Mathematicians, Bertrand
2870     Russell</u></b></p>
2871     <ul>
2872     <li>&quot;One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief
2873     that one's work is terribly important.&quot;--Bertrand Russell</li>
2874     </ul>
2875     <hr>
2876     <p><b><u><a name="sci_mat_carl_sagan"></a>Scientists And Mathematicians, Carl
2877     Sagan</u></b></p>
2878     <ul>
2879     <li>&quot;One of the great commandments of science is:&nbsp; 'Mistrust arguments from
2880     authority.'&quot;--Carl Sagan</li>
2881     <li>&quot;Look again at that dot.&nbsp; That's here.&nbsp; That's home.&nbsp; That's us.&nbsp;
2882     On it
2883     everyone you love, everyone you know, everyone you ever heard of, every human
2884     being who ever was, lived out their lives.&nbsp; The aggregate of our joy and
2885     suffering, thousands of confident religions, ideologies, and economic doctrines,
2886     every hunter and forager, every hero and coward, every creator and destroyer of
2887     civilization, every king and peasant, every young couple in love, every mother
2888     and father, hopeful child, inventor and explorer, every teacher of morals, every
2889     corrupt politician, every 'superstar', every 'supreme leader', every saint and
2890     sinner in the history of our species lived here--on a mote of dust suspended in
2891     a sunbeam.&quot;--Carl Sagan, precise source unknown</li>
2892     <li>&quot;The Earth is a very small stage in a vast cosmic arena.&nbsp; Think of the rivers
2893     of blood spilled by all those generals and emperors so that, in glory and
2894     triumph, they could become the momentary masters of a fraction of a dot.&nbsp; Think
2895     of the endless cruelties visited by the inhabitants of one corner of this pixel
2896     on the scarcely distinguishable inhabitants of some other corner, how frequent
2897     their misunderstandings, how eager they are to kill one another, how fervent
2898     their hatreds.&quot;--Carl Sagan, precise source unknown</li>
2899     <li>&quot;Our posturings, our imagined self-importance, the delusion that we have some
2900     privileged position in the Universe, are challenged by this point of pale light.&nbsp;
2901     Our planet is a lonely speck in the great enveloping cosmic dark.&nbsp; In our
2902     obscurity, in all this vastness, there is no hint that help will come from
2903     elsewhere to save us from ourselves.&quot;--Carl Sagan, precise source unknown</li>
2904     <li>&quot;The Earth is the only world known so far to harbor life.&nbsp; There is nowhere
2905     else, at least not in the near future, to which our species could migrate.&nbsp;
2906     Visit, yes.&nbsp; Settle, not yet.&nbsp; Like it or not, for the moment the Earth is where we
2907     make our stand.&quot;--Carl Sagan, precise source unknown</li>
2908     <li>&quot;It has been said that astronomy is a humbling and character-building
2909     experience.&nbsp; There is perhaps no better demonstration of the folly of human
2910     conceits than this distant image of our tiny world.&nbsp; To me, it underscores our
2911     responsibility to deal more kindly with one another, and to preserve and cherish
2912     the pale blue dot, the only home we've ever known."--Carl Sagan, <i>Pale
2913     Blue Dot</i>, publication details unknown</li>
2914    
2915     <li>
2916    
2917     &quot;
2918    
2919     If you wish to make an apple pie truly from scratch, you must first invent the universe.&quot;-- Carl
2920     Sagan, astronomer, author (1934-1996)
2921     </li>
2922    
2923     </ul>
2924     <hr>
2925     <p><b><u><a name="software_software_engineering_etc"></a>Software, Software Engineering,
2926     Etc.</u></b></p>
2927     <ul>
2928     <li>&quot;Can
2929     someone give a hint on how many lines of code a programmer can produce a day?&nbsp;
2930     I
2931     know that this depends on the language, etc., but I'm most interested in C/C++.&nbsp;
2932     On my most productive single day, the program I was working on had 3000 fewer
2933     lines than it did when I started.&quot;--quote which Dan Parks got from a newsgroup, source
2934     unknown</li>
2935     <li>&quot;A complex system that works is invariably found to have evolved
2936     from a simple system that worked ... A complex system designed from scratch
2937     never works and cannot be patched up to make it work.&nbsp; You have to start over,
2938     beginning with a working simple system.&quot;--Grady Booch</li>
2939     <li>&quot;The trouble with many Software Engineering principles and methodologies
2940     is they don't concentrate on doing the time-consuming, difficult and error-prone
2941     process of getting the system requirements straightened out--instead relying on
2942     'well defined procedures' which are easy to specify, but don't help
2943     much when trying to understand what a system needs to accomplish--or more
2944     importantly, coaxing a non-technical project lead to devote his/her resources to
2945     spending time with the users.&quot;--Unknown</li>
2946     <li>&quot;I've been developing systems of varying complexity since 1990 and have yet to
2947     hear of a software engineering methodology which improves significantly on the
2948     basic principle of studying what the user needs, organizing it, adapting to
2949     change and implementing--usually in combination.&nbsp; UML isn't much more than a
2950     notational change to the entity/relationship/&quot;flowcharting&quot;/whatever we did a decade ago.&nbsp;
2951     The
2952     CASE tools have marginally improved since, but not markedly.&nbsp; But thats only my
2953     take on it ... no doubt I'm part of the problem.--Unknown</li>
2954     <li>&quot;Frankly, I figure the SEI rating stuff has a half-life of about 4 years, its
2955     got 5 or 6 more before it falls into the dustbin of antiquity.&nbsp; But, its in good
2956     company with TQM and all the other philosophies which aren't dealing with the
2957     hard problems.--<i>Possibly</i> from a book by Steve McConnell entitled <i>After
2958     The Gold Rush</i>, but probably from a review of the book.&nbsp; This quote forwarded to
2959     me by Dan Parks in November 2000.</li>
2960     <li>&quot;You can measure a programmer's perspective by noting his attitude on
2961     the continuing viability of FORTRAN.&quot;--Alan Perlis</li>
2962     <li>&quot;The bitterness of poor quality remains long after the sweetness of
2963     meeting the schedule has been forgotten.&quot;--Anonymous</li>
2964     <li>&quot;Requirements are like water. They're easier to build on when they're
2965     frozen.&quot;--Anonymous</li>
2966     <li>&quot;Programming is like sex: one mistake and you have to support it for
2967     the rest of your life.&quot;--Michael Sinz</li>
2968     <li>&quot;Bugs lurk in corners and congregate at boundaries.&quot;--Boris
2969     Beizer, <i>Software Testing Techniques</i></li>
2970     <li>&quot;In programming, it's often the 'buts' in the specification that kill
2971     you.&quot;--Boris Beizer, <i>Software Testing Techniques</i></li>
2972     <li>&quot;Poor management can increase software costs more rapidly than any
2973     other factor.&quot;--Barry Boehm</li>
2974     <li>&quot;It should be noted that no ethically-trained software engineer would
2975     ever consent to write a 'DestroyBaghdad' procedure.&nbsp; Basic professional ethics
2976     would instead require him to write a 'DestroyCity' procedure, to which 'Baghdad'
2977     could be given as a parameter.&quot;--Nathaniel S. Borenstein</li>
2978     <li>&quot;The most likely way for the world to be destroyed, most experts
2979     agree, is by accident.&nbsp; That's where we come in; we're computer professionals.&nbsp;
2980     We
2981     cause accidents.&quot;--Nathaniel S. Borenstein</li>
2982     <li>&quot;Any sufficiently advanced bug is indistinguishable from a
2983     feature.&quot;--Bruce Brown</li>
2984     <li>&quot;The trouble with programmers is that you can never tell what a
2985     programmer is doing until it's too late.&quot;--Seymour Cray</li>
2986     <li>&quot;There are two ways of constructing a software design:&nbsp; One way is to
2987     make it so simple that there are obviously no deficiencies, and the other way is
2988     to make it so complicated that there are no obvious deficiencies.&nbsp; The first
2989     method is far more difficult.&quot;--C. A. R. Hoare</li>
2990     <li>&quot;Premature optimization is the root of all evil in
2991     programming.&quot;--C.
2992     A. R. Hoare</li>
2993     <li>&quot;Programming can be fun, so can cryptography; however they should not
2994     be combined.&quot;--Kreitzberg and Shneiderman</li>
2995     <li>&quot;The only thing more frightening than a programmer with a screwdriver
2996     or a hardware engineer with a program is a user with a pair of wire cutters and
2997     the root password.&quot;--Elizabeth Zwicky</li>
2998     <li>&quot;Programming without an overall architecture or design in mind is like
2999     exploring a cave with only a flashlight:&nbsp; you don't know where you've been, you
3000     don't know where you're going, and you don't know quite where you
3001     are.&quot;--Danny
3002     Thorpe</li>
3003     <li>&quot;Act in haste and repent at leisure; code too soon and debug
3004     forever.&quot;--Raymond Kennington</li>
3005     <li>&quot;At some point you have to decide whether you're going to be a
3006     politician or an engineer.&nbsp; You cannot be both.&nbsp; To be a politician is to champion
3007     perception over reality.&nbsp; To be an engineer is to make perception subservient to
3008     reality.&nbsp; They are opposites.&nbsp; You can't do both
3009     simultaneously.&quot;--H. W. Kenton</li>
3010     <li>&quot;'Don't fix it if it ain't broke' presupposed that you can't improve
3011     something that works reasonably well already.&nbsp; If the world's inventors had
3012     believed this, we'd still be driving Model A Fords and using
3013     outhouses.&quot;--H.
3014     W. Kenton</li>
3015     <li>&quot;There has never been an unexpectedly short debugging period in the
3016     history of computers.&quot;--Steven Levy</li>
3017     <li>&quot;An interactive debugger is an outstanding example of what is not
3018     needed--it encourages trial-and-error hacking rather than systematic design,
3019     and also hides marginal people barely qualified for precision
3020     programming.&quot;--Harald
3021     Mills</li>
3022     <li>&quot;We try to solve the problem by rushing through the design process so
3023     that enough time is left at the end of the project to uncover the errors that
3024     were made because we rushed through the design process.&quot;--Glenford J. Myers</li>
3025    
3026     <li>
3027    
3028     &quot;
3029    
3030     Adding manpower to a late software project makes it later.&quot;-- Frederick P. Brooks, Jr. [The Mythical Man-Month]
3031     </li>
3032    
3033     <li>
3034    
3035     &quot;
3036    
3037     Hofstadter's Law:&nbsp; The time and effort required to complete a project are always more than you expect, even when you take into account Hofstadter's Law.&quot;
3038     </li>
3039    
3040     </ul>
3041     <hr>
3042     <p><b><u><a name="sports_and_sports_figures"></a>Sports And Sports Figures</u></b></p>
3043     <ul>
3044     <li>&quot;Big names don't make me weak in the knees.&quot;--Taylor Dent</li>
3045     <li>&quot;The word <i>genius</i> isn't applicable in football.&nbsp; A genius is a
3046     guy like Norman Einstein.&quot;--Joe Theisman, NFL football quarterback and sports
3047     analyst</li>
3048     <li>&quot;I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my
3049     body.&quot;--Winston Bennett, Univ. of Kentucky basketball forward</li>
3050     <li>&quot;We're going to turn this team around 360 degrees.&quot;--Jason Kidd,
3051     upon his drafting to the Dallas Mavericks</li>
3052     <li>&quot;... the genes almost always accurately reproduce.&nbsp; If they don't,
3053     you get one of the following results:&nbsp; One, monsters--that is, grossly malformed
3054     babies resulting from genetic mistakes.&nbsp; Years ago most monsters died, but now
3055     many can be saved.&nbsp; That has made possible the National Football League."--Cecil
3056     Adams</li>
3057     <li>&quot;Half this game is ninety percent mental.&quot;--Philadelphia Phillies
3058     manager Danny Ozark</li>
3059     </ul>
3060     <hr>
3061     <p><b><u><a name="unpl_wk_sit_bad_bosses_etc"></a>Unpleasant Work Situations, Bad Bosses,
3062     Etc.</u></b></p>
3063     <ul>
3064     <li>&quot;If you're unfortunate enough to have co-workers, you must learn how
3065     to manage them.&nbsp; Otherwise, like so many wildebeests on the plains of the
3066     Serengeti, they will be bumping into you, drinking from your water hole, and
3067     generally kicking up a lot of dust.&nbsp; That will cut into your
3068     happiness.&quot;--Scott
3069     Adams, <i>The Joy Of Work</i>.</li>
3070     <li>&quot;If you can decrease the unpleasantness that you experience at work,
3071     it's almost the same as giving yourself a raise.&quot;--Scott Adams, <i>The Joy
3072     Of Work</i>.</li>
3073     <li>&quot;I have yet to find the man, however exalted his station, who did not
3074     do better work and put forth greater effort under a spirit of approval than
3075     under a spirit of criticism.&quot;--Charles M. Schwab</li>
3076     </ul>
3077     <hr>
3078     <p><b><u><a name="acknowledgements"></a>Acknowledgements</u></b></p>
3079     <p>Special thanks to Pinar Kondu, Lou Miller, Daniel R. Parks, Jim
3080     Weinfurther and Marilyn A. Ashley
3081     for quotes.</p>
3082     <hr>
3083     <p align="center" style="margin-top: -2; margin-bottom: -1"><font size="1">This
3084     web page is maintained by <a href="mailto:dtashley@users.sourceforge.net">David
3085     T. Ashley</a>.&nbsp; (All donations to this page are welcome, just <a href="mailto:dtashley@users.sourceforge.net">e-mail</a>
3086     them to me.)<br>
3087     Sound
3088     credit: <i>As Good As It Gets</i>.<br>$Header: /cvsroot/esrg/sfesrg/esrgweba/htdocs/devels/quote_farm/quote_farm.htm,v 1.16 2004/04/06 22:32:19 dtashley Exp $</font></p>
3089     <hr noshade size="5">
3090     </body>
3091    
3092     </html>

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